科技生活類政事

寫作導圖

旅游見聞類

1.科技動詞運用

2.情感表達技巧

1科技雙面性

2.人文關(guān)懷表達

一'情節(jié)設計技巧

1.轉(zhuǎn)折點設計

(1)Justasshewasabouttogiveup,thesmartwatchvibratedwithanemergencyalert.

(正當她要放棄時，智能手表突然發(fā)出緊急警報振動)

解析：用時間狀語從句構(gòu)建緊張轉(zhuǎn)折，vibrated體現(xiàn)科技產(chǎn)品特性，alert引出后續(xù)救援情節(jié)

(2)Thedronecameracapturedsomethingevenhumaneyescouldn'tseeinthestorm.

(無人機攝像頭捕捉到了暴風雨中肉眼無法看到的畫面)

解析：technology+human對比句式，用couldn'tsee突出科技優(yōu)勢，為后續(xù)發(fā)現(xiàn)關(guān)鍵線索鋪墊

(3)Histremblingfingersfinallymanagedtoactivatethevoicecommand:'Callemergencycontact.'

(他顫抖的手指終于激活了語音指令：撥打緊急聯(lián)系人)

解析：細節(jié)動作+科技指令的直接引用，增強場景真實感，自然引出救援進展

(4)Threebeepsfromthehealthmonitorchangedeverythingtheyhadplannedthatnight.

(健康監(jiān)測儀的三聲提示音改變了他們當晚的所有計劃)

解析：擬聲詞+被動語態(tài)制造懸念，暗示科技產(chǎn)品即將引發(fā)重要情節(jié)轉(zhuǎn)折

2.細節(jié)呼應

(1)Thecrackedphonescreenfromparagraph1nowdisplayedlife-savinginformation.

(第一段提到的碎裂手機屏幕此刻顯示著救命信息)

解析：cracked呼應前文，now形成時間對比，體現(xiàn)科技產(chǎn)品在危急時刻的作用

(2)Grandma'sinitialdistrustofrobotsmeltedwhenthemechanicalarmsteadiedherteacup.

(當機械臂穩(wěn)住茶杯時，奶奶最初對機器人的不信任消融了)

解析：melted體現(xiàn)情感轉(zhuǎn)變，steadied呼應前文老人手抖的設定，展現(xiàn)科技人文關(guān)懷

(3)TheGPSdottheyhadlaughedatearlierbecametheironlyhopeinthewilderness.

(他們早前嘲笑過的GPS定位點成了荒野中唯一的希望)

解析：hadlaughed過去完成時強調(diào)前因后果，onlyhope突出科技重要性

(4)Fluorescentlightsinthesmartfridgeilluminatedthehandwrittennotetheyalmostmissed.

(智能冰箱的熒光燈照亮了他們差點錯過的親筆信)

解析：環(huán)境細節(jié)+科技產(chǎn)品功能結(jié)合，自然推動情節(jié)發(fā)展

二'科技元素融入

1.智能設備描寫

(1)TheAIspeakerkeptrepeatingsafetyremindersinitscalmsyntheticvoice.

(人工智能音箱用平靜的合成音不斷重復安全提醒)

解析：syntheticvoice精準描述科技產(chǎn)品特征，keptrepeating體現(xiàn)程序化特性

(2)Holographicinstructionsfloatedintheair,guidingherthroughtheemergencyprocedure.

（全息操作指南懸浮空中，指導她完成應急流程）

解析：holographic科技感詞匯，floated生動體現(xiàn)技術(shù)特性

（3）Bio-sensorsembeddedinthemattressdetectedabnormalheartrhythmsimmediately.

（床墊內(nèi)置的生物傳感器立即檢測到異常心律）

解析：embedded顯示科技融入生活，detected體現(xiàn)自動監(jiān)測功能

（4）Thetranslationearpiecebuzzedwithreal-timeconversionofthedoctor'sforeignwords.

（翻譯耳麥實時轉(zhuǎn)換醫(yī)生的外語時發(fā)出嗡嗡聲）

解析：buzzed擬聲詞+real-time展示科技即時性

2.通訊工具運用

（1）FaceTime'sshakyvideofeedrevealedthesubtlefacialdroopingdoctorsneededtosee.

（視頻通話的晃動畫面恰好顯示醫(yī)生需要觀察的面部下垂）

解析：shaky與subtle形成對比，體現(xiàn)遠程醫(yī)療價值

（2）EmergencyGPScoordinatesautomaticallysharedthroughthesmartwatch'sSOSfunction.

（智能手表SOS功能自動分享了緊急GPS坐標）

解析：automatically展示科技自主性，through引出工作原理

（3）Thefamilygroupchatexplodedwithconcernedmessagestranslatedinto20languages.

（家庭群聊瞬間涌入被翻譯成20種語言的關(guān)切信息）

解析：exploded動詞活化科技交流，translated體現(xiàn)跨文化特性

（4）AsinglemissedcallfromtheAIcaregiverstartedthechainoflife-savingevents.

（AI看護系統(tǒng)的一個未接來電開啟了救命行動鏈）

解析：missedcall制造懸念，chain比喻體現(xiàn)事件關(guān)聯(lián)性

三、語言表達提升

1.科技動詞運用

(1)Theappalgorithmprioritizedemergencycontactsbasedonlocationdata.

(應用程序算法根據(jù)定位數(shù)據(jù)優(yōu)先處理緊急聯(lián)系人)

解析：algorithm,prioritized精準使用計算機術(shù)語

(2)Thedronefootagewasbeinglivestreamedtotherescueheadquarters.

(無人機畫面正被實時傳輸?shù)骄仍笓]部)

解析：livestreamed體現(xiàn)現(xiàn)代傳輸技術(shù)，進行時態(tài)增強現(xiàn)場感

(3)Biometricauthenticationfailedthreetimesbeforerecognizingheralteredfingerprint.

(生物識別認證失敗三次后才識別出變化的指紋)

解析：authentication專業(yè)術(shù)語，before引導時間邏輯鏈

(4)Theroboticarmcalibrateditsmovementtomatchthesurgeon'stremblinghands.

(機械臂校準動作以適應醫(yī)生顫抖的雙手)

解析：calibrated技術(shù)動詞，tomatch表目的關(guān)系

2.情感表達技巧

(1)Hertearsblurredthesmartphonescreendisplayingthetestresults.

(淚水模糊了顯示檢測結(jié)果的手機屏幕)

解析：blurred雙關(guān)情感與技術(shù)，displaying現(xiàn)在分詞作后置定語

(2)Thecoldmetalsurfaceoftherobotunexpectedlyfeltcomfortingagainstherpalm.

(機器人冰冷的金屬表面意外地讓她掌心感到溫暖)

解析：cold與comforting對比，unexpectedly制造情感反轉(zhuǎn)

(3)Digitalreadoutsflashedreassuringnumberswherehumanreassurancehadfailed.

(在人類安慰失效時，電子讀數(shù)閃爍著令人安心的數(shù)字)

解析：where引導對比狀語從句，reassuring體現(xiàn)科技溫度

(4)TheemotionlessAIvoicesomehowcontainedthehopeshedesperatelyneeded.

(沒有感情的AI語音莫名承載著她急需的希望)

解析：somehow制造轉(zhuǎn)折，desperately副詞強化情感強度

四、主題升華方法

1.科技雙面性

(1)Whiletechnologyisolatedgenerations,todayitbridgedtheirunderstandingthroughtranslation

software.

(科技曾讓幾代人產(chǎn)生隔閡，而今通過翻譯軟件彌合了理解)

解析：while對比句式，bridged比喻溝通，點明主題轉(zhuǎn)變

(2)ThesameinternetthatdistractedteenagerssavedGrandma'slifethatwinternight.

(那個讓青少年分心的互聯(lián)網(wǎng)，在冬夜救了奶奶的命)

解析：same...that強調(diào)科技雙刃劍特性，winternight具體化場景

(3)Artificiallightsthatoncesymbolizedalienationnowguidedrescuersthroughthestorm.

(曾象征疏離的人造燈光，此刻指引救援者穿越暴風雨)

解析：that定語從句構(gòu)建今昔對比，through體現(xiàn)過程

(4)Digitaldependencewecriticizedailybecamesomeone'slifelineincriticalmoments.

(我們每日批判的數(shù)字依賴，成了他人危急時刻的生命線)

解析：wecriticize插入語，lifeline比喻突出科技價值

2.人文關(guān)懷表達

(1)BehindeveryflashingLEDwasahumanheartbeatingwithconcern.

(每個閃爍的LED燈背后，都跳動著關(guān)切的人心)

解析：behind空間轉(zhuǎn)換，flashing與beating動詞呼應

(2)Thecoldesttechnologywarmedwhenprogrammedwithcompassion.

(注入憐憫之心的科技，再冰冷也會變得溫暖)

解析：coldest與warmed對比，when+過去分詞結(jié)構(gòu)簡練

(3)Intheend,itwasn*tthecircuitboardbuthumanconnectionthatsavedtheday.

(最終力挽狂瀾的不是電路板，而是人與人的聯(lián)結(jié))

解析：強調(diào)句型+but轉(zhuǎn)折，點明科技的人文本質(zhì)

(4)Algorithmscalculatepossibilities,butonlyhumanscancreatemiracles.

(算法計算可能性，唯有人類能創(chuàng)造奇跡)

解析：but轉(zhuǎn)折，calculate與create動詞對仗

模擬演練

01

閱讀下面短文，根據(jù)其內(nèi)容和所給段落開頭語續(xù)寫兩段，使之構(gòu)成一篇完整的短文。

Awomanwhohadastroke（中風）whileonaFaceTimevideocallwithhersister,saidthetechnology

savedherlife.EsmeeRussell,headoftheStrokeAssociation,said,“Astrokecanhappentoanyone,atanyage,

atanytime.Thafswhyifssoimportantthatpeopleknowhowtoactfast:itcouldsaveaStrokeshappen

whenthebloodsupplytopartofthebrainiscutoffbyaclot（凝塊），ordamagedbybleedingthatcausesbrain

cellsintheaffectedareatodie.

OpokuaKwapong,wholivesaloneinNewYork,wasonacallwithhersister,AdumeaSapong,in

Manchester,whenMrsSapongnoticedthathereldersister"didn'tlookright”.Andshealsonoticedhersister,s

voicewasslurred（口齒不清）.MsKwapongsaidshehadnotrealisedhowseriousthesituationwas.

The58-year-oldKwaponghadwokenfromanafternoonsleepwhenMrsSapongcalledheronFaceTime.

MsKwapongsaid“Mysisterlookedatmeandsaidshecouldseethatmyfacedidn'tlookright.Shealsosaid

thatIwasslurringmywords,butIthoughtshewasmakingafuss（大'原〃怪）andIdidn'tbelieveher.”

MrsSapongsaidWhenIcalledKwapong,shesaidthatshe*dnotbeenfeelingwellandhadbeenfeeling

tiredandwasalsohavingsomedifficultywalking.Isaid,"Perhapsyouneedtotakesomemedicine.9Shetried

topickupaglassofwaterandwasn'tableto.ThenInoticedontheFaceTimevideocallthatherfacewas

drooping.Itoldhersheneededtohangupandimmediatelyseeadoctor.ShethoughtIwasmakingafusssoI

thencalledoneofmyothersisters,whoisadoctor,andshecouldhearherspeakingandcouldalsotellthather

speechwasslurred.Webothtoldhertocallforhelpatonce.^^

注意：

1.續(xù)寫詞數(shù)應為150左右；

2.請按如下格式在答題卡的相應位置作答。

Para.1:

MsKuaponghungupthecallandthendialedtheemergencyservices.

Para.2:

MsKwapongsaid:"Thereisnodoubtthattheinternetandtechnologysavedmylife.

【答案】MsKwaponghungupthecallandthendialedtheemergencyservices.Theambulancerushed

toherhouseandnursessenthertohospital.Inhospital,MsKwapongwasdiagnosedwithstrokeandshould

stayathospitalforatleastoneweek,HersisterAdumeaSaponglookedafterher.Herdoctorsaidshewaslucky

toreceivetreatmentquicklyorshecouldhavehadmuchtrouble.

MsKwapongsaid:"ThereisnodoubtthattheInternetandtechnologysavedmylife.Ifmysisterhad

notnoticedthatsomethingwasnotright,thenthingscouldhavebeensodifferent.Notonlydidtechnologysave

mylife,itnowalsoallowsmetolivemylife.IrelyalotonFaceTimeasI'mnotabletotravelasmuchasIdid

previously.YouhearalotofnegativestoriesabouttheInternetandtechnology,butIthinkthisisanexampleof

howtechnologycanhelpusindaily

【解析】

本文以人物為線索，講述了一對老年姐妹在視頻的過程中，妹妹發(fā)現(xiàn)姐姐的臉色不太好，說話也變

得口齒不清，便建議姐姐立即聯(lián)系醫(yī)院。憑借著互聯(lián)網(wǎng)和科技的優(yōu)勢，老人被及時送到了醫(yī)院得到救治。

【詳解】

1.段落續(xù)寫：

①由第一段首句內(nèi)容“Kuapong女士掛斷了電話，然后撥打了急救服務。”可知，第一段可描寫

Kuapong女士得到了及時的救治。

②由第二段首句內(nèi)容“Kwapong女士說：‘毫無疑問，互聯(lián)網(wǎng)和科技救了我的命。，”可知，第二段可

描寫Kuapong女士對互聯(lián)網(wǎng)和科技的看法。

2.續(xù)寫線索：聯(lián)系急救服務——得到救治——感嘆網(wǎng)絡和科技的幫助

3.詞匯激活

行為類

①.照料：lookafter/takecareof

②.接受：receive/get

③.注意：notice/note

情緒類

①.幸運的：lucky/fortunate

②.負面的：negative/minus

【點睛】

[高分句型l]Herdoctorsaidshewasluckytoreceivetreatmentquicklyorshecouldhavehadmuch

trouble.（運用了省略連接詞that的賓語從句）

[高分句型2]Notonlydidtechnologysavemylife,itnowalsoallowsmetolivemylife.（運用了notonly

位于句首的部分倒裝句式）

02

Backintheearly1980s,theideaofhomecomputerswascatchingon.Iwasn*tkeenongettingone.

Somehow,Ievolvedandhaveownedseveralcomputersovertheyears.Somedays,Ilovedmycomputer,but

moreoftenthannot,Ihatedit.Ididn'tgrowupwiththem,andtheywereachallengetomymentalhealth.

Dealingwithmoderntechnologywasmyintroductiontostress,andIknowwhotoblame:mychildren.

Theyweren'tsatisfiedthattheirdadandIfinallyboughtacomputerandlearnedtosende-mails.Wewere

quitehappywiththat,butnextcameacellphone.Thenjusttalkingonthephonewasnotacceptable;they

insistedwelearntotextaswell.Wecouldn'tgetabreak.

IrememberwellthenightthatFacebookbecameahouseholdwordaroundhere.Thosekidsofourswere

determinedtosetupajointaccountforus.Ittooksomeconvincing.Wefeltnoguiltforgratingon（激怒）their

nervesconsideringthedramathey'dsometimescreatedforusduringtheirteenageyears.Alittlepayback

wouldn'thurtthosetwo.

Morerecently,myhusbandandIwereforcedintogettingridofourflipphonesandgettingsmartphones.I

willadmitthatIprogressedintoappreciatingmine.IlikedspeakingtoSiriandfindingoutwhatIneededto

knowinaninstant.IenjoyedhavingInternetaccesseverywhereIwent.Ifeltasenseofaccomplishment;my

husband-notsomuch.Tothisday,hewouldhappilytakebackhisflipphone.

LastChristmas,ourchildrensurpriseduswithyetanotherpopularformoftechnology-Alexa.Thegirls

tookoursmartphonesinhandandgotusprogrammed.Beforewefullyunderstoodwhatwashappening,we

couldtellAlexatoturnourlamponoroff,andshewould.Tobehonest,wewereabitannoyedathavingto

learnhowtouseyetanotherdevice,butwedecidedtokeepit.Wemasteredturningthelamponandoff,and

onceagainIgotthehangofitsoonerthanmyhusbanddid.IbecamehisAlexacoach.

注意：

1.續(xù)寫詞數(shù)應為150左右；

2.請按如下格式在答題卡的相應位置作答。

Onenight,AlexadidnotturnonthelampwhenIgavethecommand.

Weshouldthankourchildrenandgrandchildren.

【答案1Onenight,AlexadidnotturnonthelampwhenIgavethecommand.Itriedtosay“Turnonthe

light“toitcountlesstimes,butAlexadidn'twork."Newtechnologiesarealwaysunreliable.^^myhusband

complained.IsearchedtheInternetandimmediatelyfoundthereasonwhyAlexcouldn'twork.Ijustneededto

tellAlextosetthelightcolortowhiteorwhatevercolorIwanted,andthenitwouldturnonthelight.Then

Alexturnedonthelightitself.

Weshouldthankourchildrenandgrandchildren.Itwasourchildrenandgrandchildrenthattaughtusto

usetechnologysothatIcouldfindasolutionontheInternetbymyself.Withoutthem,ourlifeisalways

invariableandboring.Ourchildrenandgrandchildren“fbrce“ustoacceptandusetechnology,whichseemsto

putusunderpressure.However,thefactisthatourchildrenandgrandchildrenletusreallyacceptanduse

technologytomakeourlifemoreconvenient.

【解析】

本文以人物為線索展開，講述了作者的孩子們?yōu)樽约汉驼煞蛲扑]了許多現(xiàn)代科技產(chǎn)品，作者從很有

壓力變得喜歡上它們，有一種成就感，但是作者的丈夫不太喜歡。去年圣誕節(jié)，孩子們給作者的智能手

機安裝了Alexa程序，可以打開或者關(guān)閉燈。

【詳解】

1.段落續(xù)寫：

①由第一段首句內(nèi)容“一天晚上，當我發(fā)出命令時，Alexa沒有開燈。”可知，第一段可描寫作者和

丈夫?qū)Υ说牟煌磻髡哂煤⒆觽兘虝募寄芟氲睫k法解決問題。

②由第二段首句內(nèi)容“我們應該感謝我們的子孫?！笨芍?，第二段可描寫作者感受到孩子們教會的科

技是有用處的，感謝孩子們。

2.續(xù)寫線索：Alexa不工作一丈夫抱怨一作者想辦法一Alexa被修好一感謝孩子們一科

技的用處

3.詞匯激活

行為類

①打開：turnon/switchon

②教：teach/instruct

③找到：find/seekout

情緒類

①感謝：thank/appreciate

②壓力：pressure/stress

【點睛】

[高分句型1]IsearchedtheInternetandimmediatelyfoundthereasonwhyAlexcouldn'twork.（由關(guān)

系副詞why引導限制性定語從句）

【高分句型2]However,thefactisthatourchildrenandgrandchildrenletusreallyacceptanduse

technologytomakeourlifemoreconvenient.（由連接詞that弓|導表語從句）

03

GrandmaAgnesisninety-nineyearsoldandstillliveinthesamehouseahe'slivedinformorethansixty

years.Shewasoneofthirteenchildrenraisedonafarm.Andnow.sheisrathersetinherways,

Fortwelveyears,Grandmaagesenjoyedthecorupanyofherdog,Snoopy.Theblackandwhitespotted

mustwasaconstantpresenceinherhomeandheryard.DuringthetimethatshehadSnoopy,GrandmaAgnes

startedshowingsignsofdementia.Myfamilyworkedtogethertokeepherlivingindependentlybutsafe.

Itwasdifficultformydadthedayhepulledthebatteryfromhercartokeepherfromusingherstillvalid

driver'slicense,Everyvisitafterthatday,GrandmaAgneswouldinsistthathebuyheranewcarbattery

becauseherswasdeadagain.Dadnoddedandagreedtodoit,knowingthattheconversationwouldsoonbe

forgotten.

Threeyearsago.Snoopypassedaway,Mydad.AuntCarolandUncleEdthoughtofwaystoensurethat

GrandmaAgneswouldknowthatSnoopywasgone,TheyhadburialserviceinthebackyardwithGrandma.

UncleEdprintedapictureofSnoopywith“RestinPeace“writtenacrossthebottomandstuckittothe

refrigerator,Butonthedailyvisits.GrandmaAgnesstillaskedaboutSnoopy,Sheaccusedtheneighborsof

takingherdogbecauseshewassurethatsheheardbinbarkingfromtheiryard.

Havingafamilymemberwithdementiaisheartbreakingandtrying.ForeveryvisitPvemadeinthepast

fiveyears,mydadhasmadeapointtotellmethatsheprobablywon'trememberwhoIamnorthatmykidsare

hergreatgrandchildren,I'vesatthroughconversationswherewepatientlyrepeatedanswerstoquestionsthat

wereansweredafewmomentsago.GrandmaAgnesisstillthere,andshe'sstillherstubbornself,butshe

doesn'tgrasptheworldaroundher,AndyetsheinsistsonlivingindependentlyandaskingaboutSnoopy

constantly.

注意：

1.續(xù)寫詞數(shù)應為150左右；

2.請按如下格式在答題卡的相應位置作答.

Afewmonthsago,UncleEdcameupwithgoodideaandboughtaroboticdogforGrandmaAges.

EveryoneinourfamilyispleasedthatGrandmaAgneshasbeensokindtoSnoopy.

【答案1Para1:

Afewmonthsago,UncleEdcameupwithagoodideaandboughtaroboticdogforGrandmaAgnes.It

hassoftfurandbarkswhenitsensesmotionnearby.Grandmaq