Eveline(伊芙林)Shesatatthewindowwatchingtheeveninginvadetheavenue.Herheadwasleanedagainstthewindowcurtainsandinhernostrilswastheodourofdustycretonne.Shewastired.Fewpeoplepassed.Themanoutofthelasthousepassedonhiswayhome;sheheardhisfootstepsclackingalongtheconcretepavementandafterwardscrunchingonthecinderpathbeforethenewredhouses.Onetimethereusedtobeafieldthereinwhichtheyusedtoplayeveryeveningwithotherpeople'schildren.ThenamanfromBelfastboughtthefieldandbuilthousesinit——notliketheirlittlebrownhousesbutbrightbrickhouseswithshiningroofs.Thechildrenoftheavenueusedtoplaytogetherinthatfield——theDevines,theWaters,theDunns,littleKeoghthecripple,sheandherbrothersandsisters.Ernest,however,neverplayed:hewastoogrownup.Herfatherusedoftentohunttheminoutofthefieldwithhisblackthornstick;butusuallylittleKeoghusedtokeepnixandcalloutwhenhesawherfathercoming.Stilltheyseemedtohavebeenratherhappythen.Herfatherwasnotsobadthen;andbesides,hermotherwasalive.Thatwasalongtimeago;sheandherbrothersandsisterswereallgrownuphermotherwasdead.TizzieDunnwasdead,too,andtheWatershadgonebacktoEngland.Everythingchanges.Nowshewasgoingtogoawayliketheothers,toleaveherhome.Home!Shelookedroundtheroom,reviewingallitsfamiliarobjectswhichshehaddustedonceaweekforsomanyyears,wonderingwhereonearthallthedustcamefrom.Perhapsshewouldneverseeagainthosefamiliarobjectsfromwhichshehadneverdreamedofbeingdivided.AndyetduringallthoseyearsshehadneverfoundoutthenameofthepriestwhoseyellowingphotographhungonthewallabovethebrokenharmoniumbesidethecolouredprintofthepromisesmadetoBlessedMargaretMaryAlacoque.Hehadbeenaschoolfriendofherfather.Wheneverheshowedthephotographtoavisitorherfatherusedtopassitwithacasualword:“HeisinMelbournenow.”Shehadconsentedtogoaway,toleaveherhome.Wasthatwise?Shetriedtoweigheachsideofthequestion.Inherhomeanywayshehadshelterandfood;shehadthosewhomshehadknownallherlifeabouther.Ofcourseshehadtoworkhard,bothinthehouseandatbusiness.WhatwouldtheysayofherintheStoreswhentheyfoundoutthatshehadrunawaywithafellow?Sayshewasafool,perhaps;andherplacewouldbefilledupbyadvertisement.MissGavanwouldbeglad.Shehadalwayshadanedgeonher,especiallywhenevertherewerepeoplelistening.“MissHill,don'tyouseetheseladiesarewaiting?”“Looklively,MissHill,please.”ShewouldnotcrymanytearsatleavingtheStores.Butinhernewhome,inadistantunknowncountry,itwouldnotbelikethat.Thenshewouldbemarried——she,Eveline.Peoplewouldtreatherwithrespectthen.Shewouldnotbetreatedashermotherhadbeen.Evennow,thoughshewasovernineteen,shesometimesfeltherselfindangerofherfather'sviolence.Sheknewitwasthatthathadgivenherthepalpitations.WhentheyweregrowinguphehadnevergoneforherlikeheusedtogoforHarryandErnest,becauseshewasagirlbutlatterlyhehadbeguntothreatenherandsaywhathewoulddotoheronlyforherdeadmother'ssake.Andnoshehadnobodytoprotecther.ErnestwasdeadandHarry,whowasinthechurchdecoratingbusiness,wasnearlyalwaysdownsomewhereinthecountry.Besides,theinvariablesquabbleformoneyonSaturdaynightshadbeguntowearyherunspeakably.Shealwaysgaveherentirewages——sevenshillings——andHarryalwayssentupwhathecouldbutthetroublewastogetanymoneyfromherfather.Hesaidsheusedtosquanderthemoney,thatshehadnohead,thathewasn'tgoingtogiveherhishard-earnedmoneytothrowaboutthestreets,andmuchmore,forhewasusuallyfairlybadonSaturdaynight.IntheendhewouldgiveherthemoneyandaskherhadsheanyintentionofbuyingSunday'sdinner.Thenshehadtorushoutasquicklyasshecouldanddohermarketing,holdingherblackleatherpursetightlyinherhandassheelbowedherwaythroughthecrowdsandreturninghomelateunderherloadofprovisions.Shehadhardworktokeepthehousetogetherandtoseethatthetwoyoungchildrenwhohadbeenlefttohrchargewenttoschoolregularlyandgottheirmealsregularly.Itwashardwork——ahardlife——butnowthatshewasabouttoleaveitshedidnotfinditawhollyundesirablelife.ShewasabouttoexploreanotherlifewithFrank.Frankwasverykind,manly,open-hearted.Shewastogoawaywithhimbythenight-boattobehiswifeandtolivewithhiminBuenosAyreswherehehadahomewaitingforher.Howwellsherememberedthefirsttimeshehadseenhim;hewaslodginginahouseonthemainroadwheresheusedtovisit.Itseemedafewweeksago.Hewasstandingatthegate,hispeakedcappushedbackonhisheadandhishairtumbledforwardoverafaceofbronze.Thentheyhadcometoknoweachother.HeusedtomeetheroutsidetheStoreseveryeveningandseeherhome.HetookhertoseeTheBohemianGirlandshefeltelatedasshesatinanunaccustomedpartofthetheatrewithhim.Hewasawfullyfondofmusicandsangalittle.Peopleknewthattheywerecourtingand,whenhesangaboutthelassthatlovesasailor,shealwaysfeltpleasantlyconfused.HeusedtocallherPoppensoutoffun.Firstofallithadbeenanexcitementforhertohaveafellowandthenshehadbeguntolikehim.Hehadtalesofdistantcountries.HehadstartedasadeckboyatapoundamonthonashipoftheAllanLinegoingouttoCanada.Hetoldherthenamesoftheshipshehadbeenonandthenamesofthedifferentservices.HehadsailedthroughtheStraitsofMagellanandhetoldherstoriesoftheterriblePatagonians.HehadfallenonhisfeetinBuenosAyres,hesaid,andhadcomeovertotheoldcountryjustforaholiday.Ofcourse,herfatherhadfoundouttheaffairandhadforbiddenhertohaveanythingtosaytohim.“Iknowthesesailorchaps,”hesaid.OnedayhehadquarrelledwithFrankandafterthatshehadtomeetherloversecretly.Theeveningdeepenedintheavenue.Thewhiteoftwolettersinherlapgrewindistinct.OnewastoHarry;theotherwastoherfather.ErnesthadbeenherfavouritebutshelikedHarrytoo.Herfatherwasbecomingoldlately,shenoticed;hewouldmissher.Sometimeshecouldbeverynice.Notlongbefore,whenshehadbeenlaidupforaday,hehadreadheroutaghoststoryandmadetoastforheratthefire.Anotherday,whentheirmotherwasalive,theyhadallgoneforapicnictotheHillofHowth.Sherememberedherfatherputtingonhermothersbonnettomakethechildrenlaugh.Hertimewasrunningoutbutshecontinuedtositbythewindow,leaningherheadagainstthewindowcurtain,inhalingtheodourofdustycretonne.Downfarintheavenueshecouldhearastreetorganplaying.SheknewtheairStrangethatitshouldcomethatverynighttoremindherofthepromisetohermother,herpromisetokeepthehometogetheraslongasshecould.Sherememberedthelastnightofhermother'sillness;shewasagainintheclosedarkroomattheothersideofthehallandoutsidesheheardamelancholyairofItaly.Theorgan-playerhadbeenorderedtogoawayandgivensixpence.Sherememberedherfatherstruttingbackintothesickroomsaying:“DamnedItalians!comingoverhere!”Asshemusedthepitifulvisionofhermother'slifelaiditsspellontheveryquickofherbeing——thatlifeofcommonplacesacrificesclosinginfinalcraziness.Shetrembledassheheardagainhermother'svoicesayingconstantlywithfoolishinsistence:“DerevaunSeraun!DerevaunSeraun!”Shestoodupinasuddenimpulseofterror.Escape!Shemustescape!Frankwouldsaveher.Hewouldgiveherlife,perhapslove,too.Butshewantedtolive.Whyshouldshebeunhappy?Shehadarighttohappiness.Frankwouldtakeherinhisarms,foldherinhisarms.Hewouldsaveher.ShestoodamongtheswayingcrowdinthestationattheNorthWall.Heheldherhandandsheknewthathewasspeakingtoher,sayingsomethingaboutthepassageoverandoveragain.Thestationwasfullofsoldierswithbrownbaggages.Throughthewidedoorsoftheshedsshecaughtaglimpseoftheblackmassoftheboat,lyinginbesidethequaywall,withilluminedportholes.Sheanswerednothing.Shefelthercheekpaleandcoldand,outofamazeofdistress,sheprayedtoGodtodirecther,toshowherwhatwasherduty.Theboatblewalongmournfulwhistleintothemist.Ifshewent,tomorrowshewouldbeontheseawithFrank,steamingtowardsBuenosAyres.Theirpassagehadbeenbooked.Couldshestilldrawbackafterallhehaddoneforher?Herdistressawokeanauseainherbodyandshekeptmovingherlipsinsilentferventprayer.Abellclangeduponherheart.Shefelthimseizeherhand:“Come!”Alltheseasoftheworldtumbledaboutherheart.Hewasdrawingherintothem:hewoulddrownher.Shegrippedwithbothhandsattheironrailing.“Come!”No!No!No!Itwasimpossible.Herhandsclutchedtheironinfrenzy.Amidtheseasshesentacryofanguish.“Eveline!Evvy!”Herushedbeyondthebarrierandcalledtohertofollow.Hewasshoutedattogoonbuthestillcalledtoher.Shesetherwhitefacetohim,passive,likeahelplessanimal.Hereyesgavehimnosignofloveorfarewellorrecognition.她坐在窗前看著黃昏涌上大街。她的頭靠在窗簾上,鼻孔里滿是提花窗簾布上的塵土氣味。她累了。很少有人走過。最后一所房子里的那個(gè)男人經(jīng)過這里往家走;她聽見他啪嗒啪嗒的腳步聲走過水泥道,然后又嘎吱嘎吱地踩在新紅房子前的煤渣小路上。過去那里曾經(jīng)有一塊空地,他們每晚都在空地上和其他家的孩子一起玩耍。后來一個(gè)貝爾法斯特來的男人買走了那塊地并在那里建了房子——與他們棕色的小房子不同,他的房子是明亮的磚房還有閃亮的屋頂。這條街的孩子們過去總是在那塊地上玩——迪瓦恩家的,沃特家的,鄧恩家的,瘸子小基奧,她和她的兄弟姐妹。但是歐內(nèi)斯特卻從來沒有玩過,他太大了。她的父親經(jīng)常用他那根黑刺李木的拐杖到地里把她們趕出去;但小基奧總是站崗,一看見她的父親過來就大聲喊。即使這樣他們那時(shí)似乎還是很開心。她父親還沒有這么壞,而且她母親也還活著。那是很久以前的事了,她和兄弟姐妹都已經(jīng)長大了;她的母親死了。迪齊·鄧恩也死了,沃特一家回英格蘭了。所有的一切都變了?，F(xiàn)在她也要像其他人那樣離開自己的家。家!她環(huán)顧屋內(nèi),審視著這么多年來她每周都要撣擦一遍的一切熟悉的物品,心里奇怪究竟哪來的這么多灰塵。也許她再也見不到那些熟悉的東西了,她做夢也沒想到過和它們分開?？墒沁@么多年里她從來沒有弄清楚那張泛黃的照片上的牧師的姓名,照片就掛在墻上,在破舊的風(fēng)琴的上邊,旁邊彩色印刷的是她對已故的瑪麗·阿拉科特的許諾。他是父親的學(xué)友。每次父親把照片遞給到家里的朋友看時(shí),總是不經(jīng)意地帶一句:“他現(xiàn)在在墨爾本?！彼呀?jīng)答應(yīng)離開,離開自己的家。這樣做明智嗎?她試著權(quán)衡這個(gè)問題的每一個(gè)方面。在家里不管怎么說她有吃有住;有她認(rèn)識(shí)了一輩子的人在她身邊。當(dāng)然她得拼命干活,不論是在家里還是在商店里。如果商店里的人知道她和一個(gè)男人跑了,她們會(huì)怎么說她呢?也許說她是一個(gè)傻瓜;她們會(huì)登廣告找別人代替她的位置。加文小姐會(huì)很高興。她總是勝過她,尤其是有旁人聽著的時(shí)候。“希爾小姐,難道你沒有看見這些女士在等著嗎?”“請精神點(diǎn),希爾小姐。”離開商店她不會(huì)掉多少眼淚的。但是在她的新家里,在一個(gè)遙遠(yuǎn)陌生的國家里,事情就不會(huì)是那樣了。她會(huì)結(jié)婚——她,伊芙林。人們會(huì)很尊重她。她不會(huì)受到她母親受過的那種對待。即使是現(xiàn)在,她已經(jīng)19歲了,她還是經(jīng)常感到自己有挨父親打的危險(xiǎn)。她知道正是因?yàn)檫@種擔(dān)心才使她心驚肉跳。她們長大以后,他還沒有像他曾經(jīng)打哈利和歐內(nèi)斯特那樣打過她,因?yàn)樗莻€(gè)女孩;但最近他開始威脅地,說要不是因?yàn)樗廊サ哪赣H的緣故,他會(huì)怎樣對待她。現(xiàn)在沒有人能保護(hù)她,歐內(nèi)斯特死了,而干教堂裝修的哈利幾乎總是在鄉(xiāng)下的什么地方。另外,每星期六都為了錢而發(fā)生的爭吵已使她開始感到說不出的厭倦。她總是交出她所有的工資——七個(gè)先令——哈利也總是盡力給家里寄錢,但問題是從她父親手中要錢。他說她過去總是胡亂花錢,沒有頭腦,還說他不會(huì)將他辛苦掙來的錢交給她到街上亂花,等等,因?yàn)樗瞧诹砩贤ǔＰ那橄喈?dāng)糟。最后他會(huì)將錢給她并問她是否打算買星期天晚飯吃的東西。然后她不得不盡快跑到市場上買東西,她緊緊地將黑皮錢包攥在手里,在人群中擠著走,直到很晚才背著沉重的食品回家。她好不容易才能將這個(gè)家維持下來,讓那兩個(gè)留給她照顧的年幼的弟弟妹妹能夠按時(shí)上學(xué),按時(shí)吃飯。工作很艱難——生活也很艱難——但是現(xiàn)在她就要離開這一切,她發(fā)現(xiàn)這種生活并不是完全令人不快的。她將要和弗蘭克一起去探索另一種生活。弗蘭克非常善良,有男子氣概,并且心胸坦蕩。她要和他一起乘夜船逃走,去做他的妻子,和他一起生活在布宜諾斯艾利斯,在那里他有一個(gè)家在等著她。第一次見到他的情景她記得多么清楚啊:他住在她常去的那條大街上的一所房子里。一切似乎就是幾個(gè)星期以前的事,他站在大門口,尖頂帽推向腦后,頭發(fā)向前散亂垂在曬得黧黑的臉上。接著他們就彼此認(rèn)識(shí)了。他每晚都到店外接她并送她回家。他帶她去看《波希米亞女孩》,同他一起坐在劇院——她難得一坐的地方——使她感覺十分得意。他非常喜歡音樂,也會(huì)唱一點(diǎn)。大家都知道他倆在談戀愛,當(dāng)他唱到愛上一個(gè)水手的少女時(shí)她常會(huì)感到一種愉快的困惑。他總是開玩笑地叫她雌天鵝。起初她覺得有個(gè)男朋友是件令人興奮的事,接著她