B1U3FamilymattersPeriod6WritingWriting

about

a

family

memoryfamilymattersWhatfamilymemorieshaveyougot?warmingupHaveyoueverfeltthattherearealotofthingsinlifethatyoujustbottledupwithinyourself?Wanttokeepyourdailymemoriessafesomewherebutnotsurewhattodo?Alwayswantedtotalktosomeoneorasecretcompanionaboutyourlifebutyouaretooshytodoso?

A

journalisaplacewhereyoucanbehonestwithyourselfandputdownyourthoughtsandthingsthathappenedaroundyou.Whenandwhere,whodidwhatforwhatpurpose?Readthejournalentryandanswerthequestions.ReadforthemainideaTenyearsago,theauthorcookedthescrambledeggs（炒雞蛋）

inthekitchenathomeforhermothertocelebrateherbirthday!timelinesbasicelementswhowhenwherewhatwhyTimeTenseReadfortheelementsWorkingroups,discussthequestions.motheranddaughteratthemother’sbirthdaytenyearsagoTheauthorwantedtosurprisehermotherwithhome-madescrambledeggsonhermother’sbirthday.Unluckily,theeggswereburnt,buttheyendeduplaughingaboutitandeatingthemallanyway.athomeBecauseitshowsthelovebetweentheauthorandhermother.Readfortheplot.Para1:Thebigdayeventuallycame,andIrushedintothekitchenearlyineagernesstosurprisemymother.____________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________Para2:Everythingwentsmoothly(平穩(wěn)地).

Unexpectedly,Ididn’trealizemymumhadgazedatmeleaningagainst(斜靠在)thedoor.____________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________Continuationwriting1.銜接句1：沖去廚房接下來做什么？——動作描寫2.心情如何？——情緒描寫3.銜接句2：如何體現(xiàn)進(jìn)展順利？——成品(樣子，香味，形狀等描寫)1.銜接句3：接下來母親會做什么或說什么？——動作+語言2.show,nottell——能用動作描寫就減少語言描寫(語言描寫要加上情感支撐)3.銜接句4：圓滿結(jié)局+主題升華Familylovemakeslifehappy,andweshouldtreasureitandshowgratitudetoourfamilymembers.Howtomakeyourdescriptionvivid（生動的）?Actiondescription動作描寫openthefridge打開冰箱fetchthefood取食物turnonthestove扭開爐灶pour…into…把…倒入…addthescallionto..把蔥花加到…stirtheeggs攪打雞蛋scenttheair使空氣彌漫香味動作鏈pan平底鍋salt鹽apron圍裙plate盤子dish碟子bowl碗cupboard碗櫥參考名詞Howtomakeyourdescriptionvivid（生動的）?Emotionaldescription情緒描寫Joywelledupinsideher.她心中涌起喜悅。Shegavemeawarmhugwithasmileofhappinessonherface.她給我一個溫暖的擁抱，臉上洋溢著幸福的笑容。Laughterlingeredaroundtheroom.笑聲在房間里縈繞。Shelaughedwithdelightasthebirthdaygiftwascarriedin.她看到生日禮物拿進(jìn)來時開心的笑。Shesaiditwasthebestbreakfastshehadeverhad.她說這是她吃過的最好的早餐

Thebigdayeventuallycame,andIrushedintothekitchenearlyineagernesstosurprisemymother.

Ifirstopenedthefridgeandfetchedtwoeggsandsomescallion.Next,Ibroketheeggsinabowlandcutupthescallion.AndthenImixedthemwithsomeoilandsaltandstirredthemtogetherhard.Afterwards,Iturnedonthe

stoveandputthepanonit.Whenthepangothot,Ipouredsomeoilintoit,andwhentheoilboiledIputthemixtureintoitandscrambledtheeggs.Afterawhile,itscentedthemorningair.

Lookingatthescrambledeggsinthepan,myheartwasfilledwithjoyandpride.

銜接句1：沖去廚房接下來做什么？銜接句2：如何體現(xiàn)一切進(jìn)展順利？——成品(樣子，香味，形狀等描寫)

Everythingwentsmoothly.

Unexpectedly,Ididn’trealizemymumhadgazedatmeleaningagainstthedoor.

“Whatareyoudoinghere,

mydear?“sheaskedsoftly.Iputthescrambledeggsonaplate,showedittoherandsaid,“Happybirthday,mydearmother!Hopeyouwillenjoythebreakfastmadeoflove!Thistime,

thescrambledeggsarenotburnt!”.Hearingmywords,shegavemeawarmhugwithasmileofhappinessonherface.

Iwokefatherupandwesangabirthdaysongformymotherwhilehavingbreakfast.Laughterlingeredaroundtheroom

andshesaiditwasthebestbreakfastshehadeverhad.Familylovemakeslifehappy,andweshouldtreasureitandshowgratitudetoourfamilymembers.銜接句4：Happyending歡聲笑語。升華句：家人的愛，珍惜感恩。動作公式1：動作，動作and動作動作公式2：V-ing...,主語+謂語注意問題：1.想好四個銜接句。第一句:動作描寫——接下來要做的事第二句:成品描述(可以是樣子，香氣，形狀等)第三句:母親動作或者語言描寫升華句:開心場景或提升主題2.減少對話描寫。能用動作就不要用對話。show,nottell3.不要增加分段。4.每段比重平均分配。5.注意把握時間。原則上30分鐘包括讀-思-寫的過程。6.有意識地注意書寫。7.時態(tài)：謂語動詞+ed；注意不規(guī)則動詞的變形。8.對話之后要配上情感或動作。

wasinthememory?

didthefamilymemoryhappen?

didthefamilymemorytakeplace?

happened?(Whatdidyouseeanddo?)

isitspecialormemorable?How

to

writeaspecialmemory?Part1.byintroducingthereasonofwritingPart2.introdution(when,who,what,where）firstmajoreventsecondpartofthestorythirdpartofthestoryPart3.bydescribingspecialtyofthememoryversion2.ElementsofafamilymemoryWhoWhenWhereWhatWhyWriteastoryWhyisitspecialormemorable?ClimaxBeginningBuild-upEndingWhatbroughtbacktheauthor’smemory?BydescribingspecialtyofthememoryWhenandwhereandwhathappened?BydescribingthesenceWhathappenedthen?Howwasthemattersolved?ByintroducingthereasonofwritingBypresenting

themoralFrameofajournalentry(thethingwecansee)Para._____Para._____Para._____123Para._____4Readfortheplot.

WeaveafamilymemoryaccordingtopicturesayellowshirtOntheladder,Iwasill.Mumcarriedmeupstairs,buttheshirttore.Mumhangeditinhercloset.Loveisindeedamagicalpower.短篇故事首段常用句式:Iwasdoing...whenIfoundanoldphoto.Thelovelymemorycamefloodingback.Howtimeflies!Icouldn'twaittosharethemwithyou.短篇故事中段常用句式:Itwasaspecialday...yearsago.Ithappened...yearsago.Idecidedto...Iwasaboutto...when...WhenI...,myeyeswatered.短篇故事尾段常用句式:Loveisindeedamagicalingredient.IhopeIwillmake/do...for...Usefulexpressions

Thereisaredshirtinmycloset.Thisisnotanordinaryshirt.EverytimeIseeit,Ican’thelpthinkingofthatunforgettablethinginmylife.

WhenIwasnineyearsold,onenight,Isuddenlycaughtahighfever,andmyfatherwasoutonabusinesstrip.Inahurry,mymothertookmetoseethedoctor.Afterthetreatment,itwasmorethan2o’clockinthemorningthenextday.WhenIgothome,theelevatorstoppedandmymotherdeci