1、Effective Sentences,Lecture five,Elements of Effective Sentences,Correct sentences alone can not necessarily make good writing. Effective Sentences and paragraphs need the following qualities: 1 Unity 2 Coherence 3 Conciseness 4 Emphasis 5 Variety,Unity (完整/一致),Unity is the first quality of an effec

2、tive sentence. A unified sentence expresses a single complete thought. It does not contain ideas that are not closely related, nor does it express a thought that is not complete by itself .,There should be a complete idea in a sentence. (see example two, p48) Sometimes the writer does not provide en

3、ough information, and then readers will fail to form a complete piece of information in their mind. So a sentence without a complete idea cannot be effective in real communication. The ideas should be closely related. (see example one, p48),exercise,He found the kitchen window open, and he put a lad

4、der against the window and climbed in.,Finding the kitchen window open, he put a ladder against it and climbed in.,My best friend at university was our English teacher and her name was Wang Ping and She taught us English for two years.,My best friend at university was our English teacher, Wang Ping,

5、 who taught us for two years.,The competition for college enrollment is extremely keen this year and the candidates spend days and nights preparing for the entrance examinations neglecting their health and so the newspapers carry articles urging teachers and parents to take up this problem seriously

6、.,As the competition for college enrollment is extremely keen this year, the candidates spend days and nights preparing for the entrance examinations, neglecting their health. In view of this, the newspapers carry articles urging teachers and parents to take up this problem seriously.,Coherence（連貫）,

7、Coherence means clear and reasonable connection between parts. A sentence is coherent when its words or parts are properly connected and their relationships unmistakably clear.,It is not coherent if it has,faulty parallel constructions(see p49) pronouns with ambiguous reference (see p50) Dangling(se

8、e p51) or misplaced modifiers(see p52-53) confusing shifts in person and number, or in voice, tense, and mood. (see p54),exercise,exercise,The room was crowded with people. Some were joking and laughing noisily. Others were drinking and smoking. This made him sick.,The room was crowded with people.

9、Some were joking and laughing noisily. Others were drinking and smoking. The atmosphere made him sick.,In the article it points out that 60 percent of American high school students have cheated at least once on tests.,The article points out that 60 percent of American high school students have cheat

10、ed at least once on tests.,The man drove the car at top speed and a lady was run over.,The man drove the car at top speed and run over a lady.,The professor left the classroom after the lecture was finished.,The professor left the classroom after he finished the lecture.,If one works hard, we are li

11、kely to pass the exam.,If one works hard, he /she is likely to pass the exam.,If a person thinks only of himself, they will have few friends. If a person thinks only of himself, he will have few friends. He studied hard day and night but fails to pass the exam. He studied hard day and night but fail

12、ed to pass the exam. First stop the noise and then you may start the discussion. First stop the noise and then start the discussion.,Conciseness（簡(jiǎn)潔）,Conciseness means that effective sentence should not contain unnecessary words, that is, there should not be any word in the sentence that does not add

13、 something to the information. These redundant words can only cover up the real meaning and confuse your readers.,The following are some examples of lack of conciseness. The flower is red in color. The war ended in the year of 1945. Professor Smith is a very learned and kind professor. In my opinion

14、, I think the second plan is better.,Methods to achieve conciseness,1. Eliminate unnecessary determiners and modifiers Writers sometimes clog up their prose with one or more extra words or phrases that seem to determine narrowly or to modify the meaning of a noun but dont actually add to the meaning

15、 of the sentence.,Wordy Any particular type of dessert is fine with me. Balancing the budget by Friday is an impossibility without some kind of extra help. The computer is a new innovation More Concise Any dessert is fine with me. Balancing the budget by Friday is impossible without extra help. The

16、computer is an innovation.,2. Change phrases into single words,Using phrases to convey meaning that could be presented in a single word contributes to wordiness. Convert phrases into single words when possible.,Wordy The employee with ambition.The department showing the best performance. More Concis

17、e The ambitious employee. The best-performing department.,3. CHANGE UNNECESSARY THAT, WHO, AND WHICH CLAUSES INTO PHRASES,Using a clause to convey meaning that could be presented in a phrase or even a word contributes to wordiness. Convert modifying clauses into phrases or single words when possible

18、.,Wordy The report, which was released recently. All applicants who are interested in the job must. The system that is most efficient and accurate. More Concise The recently released report. All job applicants must. The most efficient and accurate system.,Emphasis,Not all the parts of a sentence are

19、 equally important. Also, in a paragraph, not all the sentences are equally important. In order to emphasize certain parts in a sentence as well as a paragraph, we have some devices to achieve emphasis.,整句強(qiáng)調(diào),The speaker asked the audience what they thought were the main problems the city government

20、was facing, and how these problems should or could be solved, and he eagerly waited for answers. No answer came. The plot is confusing, the characters are very queer people, and the dialogue is hard to understand. A strange film.,The poet was born poor, and poor he remained all his life. He is not a

21、n ordinary scholar in this field; he is an authority. Government of the people, by the people, for the people shall not perish from the earth.,Placing Repeating important words The use of verbs in the active voice Subordination,Variety,It is also important to be able to write in various sentence for

22、ms. Although the form of a sentence is usually decided by what the writer wants to say, if all the sentence in a paragraph or a passage are written in similar structures, the reader will feel bored. Therefore, effective writing also requires sentence variety.,史記80后傳,人有80后者，初從文，未及義務(wù)教育之免費(fèi),不得高等學(xué)校之分配，適值

23、擴(kuò)招，過五關(guān)，斬六將，碩博相繼，寒窗數(shù)載，二十四乃成,負(fù)債十萬(wàn)。覓生計(jì)，背井離鄉(xiāng)，南下深圳，披星戴月，秉燭達(dá)旦，十年無(wú)休，蓄十萬(wàn)。樓市暴漲，無(wú)棲處，購(gòu)房金不足首付，遂投股市，翌年縮至萬(wàn)余，抑郁成疾，入院一周,傾其所有病無(wú)愈，因欠費(fèi)被逐院門。尋醫(yī)保,不合大病之規(guī)，拒付，無(wú)奈帶病還。友憐之,贈(zèng)三鹿奶粉一包，雞蛋數(shù)枚。翌日，卒。,I am Wang Jun. I am thirteen. I am a student in No. 1 Middle School. I get up at 6:00 everyday. I go to school at 7:30. I study Chinese, English, Mathe