高一英語期中考試作文講評如何寫好"建議推薦"類書信BYShirleyHu教學(xué)目錄1真題回顧與總體評價(jià)4核心問題診斷與提升2典型問題分析與修改5話題語料庫建設(shè)3范文賞析與結(jié)構(gòu)剖析6實(shí)戰(zhàn)演練與總結(jié)真題回顧主要問題內(nèi)容空洞語料匱乏邏輯斷層書面表達(dá)（滿分15分）假設(shè)你是李華，你校外教David計(jì)劃拍攝一段關(guān)于校園生活的短視頻，為此征求你的建議，請你給他回一封郵件，內(nèi)容包括：1.推薦1-2個(gè)可供拍攝的校園場景或活動(dòng)；2.說明理由。注意：1.詞數(shù)80詞左右；2.可適當(dāng)增加細(xì)節(jié)，以使行文連貫。沒有說明理由說明的理由無關(guān)語言表達(dá)常見錯(cuò)誤范文賞析與結(jié)構(gòu)剖析DearDavid,I'mexcitedtohearaboutyourvideoprojectandwouldliketosharesomeideastocaptureourcampusatmosphere.First,Ihighlyrecommendfilmingduringthemorningreadingtime.ThisiswhenclassroomsarefilledwiththesoundofstudentsrecitingChinesepoemsorpracticingEnglish,showcasingtheirpassionforlearningandprovidingafresh,energeticstarttotheday.Anothergreatspotisthesportsfieldafterclass,whereyoucancapturelivelymomentsofstudentsrunning,jumping,orplayingballgames.Thesescenesperfectlyreflecttheenergeticspiritofourcampus.Ibelievecombiningthesetwoaspectswillpresentalivelypictureofourcampuslife.Lookingforwardtoyourvideo!Yours,LiHua三段式黃金結(jié)構(gòu)開頭問候+回應(yīng)話題I'mgladtohear...主體分點(diǎn)推薦+理由闡述whichshows...willsurely...結(jié)尾祝福+期待Hopetheseideashelp...核心問題診斷與提升策略Theplaygroundisbigandbeautiful.Theplaygroundiswhereourvitalityisfullydisplayed.ItwitnessesourlaughterduringP.E.classesandourcheersduringsportsmeets,embodyingthespiritofteamworkandhealthylifestyle.問題一：理由空洞，如何深化？“公式”升級：不要只停留在What(是什么)，要寫出Why(為什么)和How(怎么樣/有何意義)。DearDavid,I'mthrilledtohearthatyou'replanningtoshootashortvideoaboutourcampuslife.Herearemysuggestions.Firstly,Ihighlyrecommendcapturingthedynamicsceneofourmorningrunningactivityontheplayground.It'snotjustexercise,butasymbolofourenergyandcollectivespirit.Thesightofhundredsofstudentsrunninginunisonunderthemorningsunistrulyuplifting.Additionally,theschoollibraryduringreadinghourwouldbeanotherperfectchoice.Itshowcasesacompletelydifferentatmosphere—quiet,serene,andfocused.Youcanfilmstudentsimmersedinbooks,whichperfectlyrepresentsourpursuitofknowledge.Ibelievethesetwosceneswillpresentabalancedviewofourschoollife.Lookingforwardtoyourfantasticvideo!Yours,LiHuaAI寫作核心問題診斷與提升策略問題二：詞匯單一，如何豐富？

1.推薦場景和描述形容詞：操場/體育館:playground,sportsfield,gymnasium;morningexercises,sportsmeeting,basketballgame圖書館:schoollibrary,readingroom,cornersofthelibrary;borrow/returnbooks,searchformaterials,havegroupdiscussions

教室:classroom,lab;haveaheateddebate,doanexperiment,listenattentively

其他:schoolcanteen,artclub,musicroom,campusgarden

動(dòng)態(tài)的:dynamic,energetic,vigorous,lively,bustling

靜態(tài)的:peaceful,tranquil,serene,focused,academic積極的:meaningful,inspiring,motivating,collaborative核心問題診斷與提升策略問題二：詞匯單一，如何豐富？

2.推薦活動(dòng)和描述的形容詞：晨讀（morningreading）學(xué)習(xí)氛圍濃厚

enthusiasticreadingaloud,positivelearningattitude運(yùn)動(dòng)會（sportsmeeting）活力四射energetic,cheerloudly,teamspirit,youthfulpassion社團(tuán)活動(dòng)（clubactivities）多才多藝

showtalents,colorfulcampuslife,creativeperformances校園風(fēng)景（campusscenery）環(huán)境優(yōu)美

beautifulscenery,greenlawns,bloomingflowers,peacefulatmosphere課堂互動(dòng)（classinteraction）activediscussions,teacher-studentinteraction,innovativeteachingmethods

話題語料庫建設(shè)進(jìn)階表達(dá)句式It’smorethanjust...it’sasymbolof...

Thisisanidealplacetocapture/vividlyshow...Itrepresents/reflects/embodies...

...wouldpresentabalancedviewof...

...wouldadddiversitytoyourvideo.實(shí)戰(zhàn)演練與修改策略1識別問題內(nèi)容空洞，缺乏細(xì)節(jié)語言單一，詞匯貧乏邏輯混亂，銜接不當(dāng)2應(yīng)用公式理由深化：What-Why-How詞匯升級：話題語料庫句式多樣化：連接詞3檢查完善格式規(guī)范：書信格式結(jié)構(gòu)清晰：三段式表達(dá)流暢：語言自然小組討論任務(wù)：選擇典型問題句子，運(yùn)用本節(jié)課所學(xué)方法進(jìn)行修改練習(xí)，重點(diǎn)關(guān)注理由闡述的深度和語言表達(dá)的豐富性。識別問題內(nèi)容空洞，缺乏細(xì)節(jié)語言單一，詞匯貧乏邏輯混亂，銜接不當(dāng)應(yīng)用公式本課