FamilyLife

TextFamiliesUnit3AbouttheAuthor

JaneHoward:JaneHowardisareporter,editorandwriter,whoseworksincludedawidelypraisedbiographyofMargaretMeadandacloselookatthedynamicsoffamiliesInformationrelatedtothetextMemorialDay:MemorialDayisaUnitedStatesfederalholidayobservedonthelastMondayofMay.FormerlyknownasDecorationDay,itcommemoratesU.S.menandwomenwhodiedwhileinthemilitaryservice.FirstenactedtohonorUnionsoldiersoftheAmericanCivilWar(itiscelebratednearthedayofreunificationaftertheCivilWar),itwasexpandedafterWorldWarI.LanguagePoints

1.Eachofusisbornintoonefamilynotofourchoosing.(Para.1):Everyonewasborninthefamilywhichwedidn’thaverighttochoosebeforehand.Theauthorpointedoutthetruththatwecannotchoosethefamilieswhichwewerebornintojustaswecannotchooseourparents,brothersandsister.2.Thenewonesbydefinitioncannotspawnus—assoonastheydothat,theystopbeingnew—butthereisplentytheycando.(Para.1):Itisnotsurethatthenewfamilywhichpicksitsmemberscleverlycanproduceus.Iftheystillproduceus,theyarenotthenewfamilies.Whenthenewfamilieshavethesameoldmembers,theylostthemeaningofbeingnew.Eventhoughtheyarenotthenewones,theycanstillwroksomewonders.3.Someblooddynastiesproducesuchfiguresregularly;otherslanguishforasmanyatfivegenerationsbetweendemigods,wonderingwitheachnewpregnancywhetherthis,atlast,mightbethemessianicbabywhowillredeemus.(Para.2):Somefamiliesregularlyproducechiefs(heroes,orheroines),aroundwhomotherfamilymemberscluster.Whileotherfamiliesareinthedifficultsituationoflackingachiefforalongtime,whichmakestheirmembersfeelverypainfulandeagertoproduceachief.Everytimethereisanew-bornbaby,thefamilymemberswonderwhetherthisbabywillbetheonewhocansavethemoutofthedifficultsituation.6.Goodfamiliesaremuchtoalltheirmembers,buteverythingtonone.(Para.4):Goodfamilieshavetheatmosphereinwhichmostoftheirmembersfeelgood.Goodfamiliesdonotchangetheirfamilyatmosphereinordertomeettheneedofsomeparticularmembers.7.ThebloodclansIfeelmostdrawntowerefoundedbyparentswhoarenearlyasdevotedtowhateveritistheydooutsideastheyaretoeachotherandtheirichildren.(Para.4):ThefamilieswhichIammostinterestedinaretheonesinwhichtheparentsdevotedtowhatevertheydoathomaaswellasoutside.Theyalsodevotetheirlifetoboththeirchildrenandotherpeoplearoundthem.8.Suchclansexudeavividsenseofsurroundingringsofrelatives,neighbors,teachers,studentsandgodparents,anyofwhomatanytimemightbreakorslideintotheinnercircle.(Para.5):Suchfamiliesshowtheirvividmoodtothecirclesofrealtives,neighbors,teachers,studentsandgodparents.Soitiseasyforthememberstoblendintheircircles.9.Insidethatcircleawholesome,tacitemotionalfeudalismdevelops:yougivemeprotection,I’llgiveyoufealty.(Para.5):Insidethecircle,theydevelopasound,impliedandemotionalrelationshipwhichislikethatinfeudalsociety;ifyouprotectme,I’llbeloyaltoyou.10.Nothingweldsafamilymorethanthese.Ritualsarevitalespeciallyforclanswithouthistories,becausetheyevokeapast,implyafuture,andhintatcontinuity.(Para.6):Ritualsarethebestonesthatcanuniteafamily.Ritualsareveryimportant,especiallyforthefamilieswhichdon’thavehistories.Ritualsareessentialbecausetheycanmakethefamilymembersreacalltheirpast,andtheycansuggesttheirfuture,andtheyinferthecontinuityofgenerations.11.Theseperformanceswerealwayshollow,becausethephenomenologyofthemomentgotsacrificedfortheideaofthemoment.(Para.6):Theseperformances(talkingaboutthetopicsthatcelebrateourcohesionasafamily)werealwaysbarrenbecausetheseperformancescannotreflecttherealfeelingsandideasatthatmoment.12.Theyemergearoundconstitutivemoments,momentsthatonlyhappenonce,aroundwhosememorymeaningscluster.(Para.6):Theseritualscomeintobeingatsomespecialmomentsthathappenedonlyonce.Themomoriesofallthefamilymembersclusteratthesemoments,whichwillhauntintheirminds.13.Iknowclanswhosemembersgreeteachotherwithgingerlyhandshakesor,inwhatpassforkisses,withhurriedbrushesofsidejawbones,asiftheobjectweretotouchnotthelipsbuttheears.(Para.7):Iknowsomefamilieswhosemembersshakehandscautiouslywhentheygreeteachother.Ortheygreeteachotherinthewaywhichismistakenlyseenasakiss,fortheyonlybrushsidesofjawbonesofeachotherhurriedly,asiftheobjecttheyaregoingtotouchisnotthelipsbuttheears.Passfor:bemistakenfororacceptedassb.orsth.else.Children’stoygunsnowlooksorealisticthattheycanoftenpassfortherealthing.14.MoreandmoreIrealizethateverybody,regardlessofage,needstobehuggedandcomfortedinabrotherlyorsisterlywaynowandthen.(Para.7):GraduallyIbecomeawareofthefactthatnomatterhowoldweare,wesometimesneedtobehuggedandconsoledinabrotherlyorsosterlyway.15.Parenthood,however,isastatewhichsomemissbychanceandothersbydesign,andavocationtowhichnotallarecalled.(Para.8):Somepeoplelosethechanceofbeingparentsintentionallyoraccidentally.Parenthoodisnotajobthateverybodyhastheopportunitytobeinvitedtodo.Bychance:withoutadvanceplanningShehadmetherMr.Rightbychance.Bydesign:intentionallyWhetherbyaccidentordesign,wemetthereagain.16.Attention,inexcess,canturntofawning,whichisn’tmuchbetterthanneglect.(Para.8):Toomuchattentionwillbecomeakindofflattering.Itisnotbetterthanbeingneglected.17.Ifactualgrandparentsarenotathand,nofamilyshouldhavetoohardatimefindingsubstituteonestowhomtogiveunfeighedhomage.(Para.9):Ifthereisnoactualgrandparentinthefamily,itisnotabigproblem,becauseitiseasytofindsomeonetoactasagrandparent,towhomfamilymemberspaytheirsincererespects.InsertTitleTextFamilyLife

TextFamiliesTranslationAllfamiliesaredifferent,andallfamilieshavetheirownissues,butthequalitiesofagoodfamilytendtobethesame:respect,responsibility,tolerance,honesty,courage,integrity,self-discipline,compassionandgenerosity.Respectyourparents.Dothisnotjustbygivingthemrespec