考向40讀后續(xù)寫之動(dòng)作、心理與對(duì)話描寫

在英語(yǔ)讀后續(xù)寫中，利用恰當(dāng)?shù)膭?dòng)詞進(jìn)行符合特定情境的動(dòng)作描寫，真實(shí)準(zhǔn)確地描述動(dòng)作過(guò)程，以“動(dòng)”傳神，

可以增強(qiáng)續(xù)寫語(yǔ)篇的靈動(dòng)性。與此同時(shí)可以適當(dāng)利用契合人物性格特點(diǎn)的心理描寫和對(duì)話描寫，使續(xù)寫部分更

為生動(dòng)。

第一部分動(dòng)作描寫

一、動(dòng)作描寫的3個(gè)原則

①要準(zhǔn)確：表現(xiàn)一個(gè)動(dòng)作可以利用許多動(dòng)詞，但應(yīng)恰當(dāng)利用最準(zhǔn)確的動(dòng)詞，刻畫對(duì)應(yīng)的動(dòng)作。

②有過(guò)程：展示人物個(gè)性的動(dòng)作時(shí)，應(yīng)通過(guò)細(xì)節(jié)描寫展示出動(dòng)作的過(guò)程，在續(xù)寫時(shí)，應(yīng)按動(dòng)作的先后順序敘

述整個(gè)過(guò)程。

③用修飾：在描寫動(dòng)作時(shí)，可利用各種狀語(yǔ)，說(shuō)明時(shí)間、地點(diǎn)、原因、伴隨等情況，使動(dòng)作描寫更豐富。

二、動(dòng)作描寫常用的高分素材

與肢體語(yǔ)言相關(guān)的動(dòng)作描寫素材

⑴head

①Sheturnedandheadedforthedoor.

她轉(zhuǎn)身朝門走去。

②Heburied/put/heldhisheadinhands,greatlyannoyed.

他雙手抱頭，非常生氣。

③Manypeopleintheaudiencenoddedinagreement.

許多觀眾點(diǎn)頭表示贊同。

@Ifellasleepassoonasmyheadhitthepillow.

頭一碰枕頭我就睡著了。

@Hchung/dropped/lowered/l)ent/bowedhisheadinshame.

他羞愧地低下了頭。

(2)face

?Herfacepaledwithfright.

她嚇得臉都白了。

②Abrightsmileappearedon/spreadacross/crossedhisface.

他的臉上露出了燦爛的笑容。

@Hcrfacelitup/brightened/glowedwhenIgaveherthepresent.

我給她禮物時(shí)，她的臉上煥發(fā)出了光彩。

(3)cheek

①Colorrushecl/flooded/rosctohercheekswhensherealizedshewasbeingwatched.

意識(shí)到有人在看她，她頓時(shí)漲紅了臉。

②Hefelthischeeksburningwithshame.

他因?yàn)樾呃⒍械侥橆a發(fā)燒。

③Hercheekswerewetwithtears.

她淚流滿面。

(4)eye

①Heturnedhiseyestothedoorwhenheheardthehandleturning.

聽到門把轉(zhuǎn)動(dòng)的聲音，他向門那邊看去。

②Tinasqueezedhereyesshutandbitherlip.

蒂娜閉上雙眼，咬了咬嘴唇。

③Shelookedatherfatherstraightintheeyeandansweredhisquestiontruthfully.

她直視父親的眼睛，誠(chéng)實(shí)地回答了他的問題。

④Shetriedtositup,hereyesfixedonJoan'sface.

她試圖坐起來(lái)，雙眼緊盯著瓊的臉。

⑤Ifelttearswellupinmyeyes.

我感到淚水在眼里涌出來(lái)。

(5)mouth

①Ourmouthsdroppedopeninsurprise.

我們驚奇地張大了嘴。

②MymouthstartedwateringwhenIsmelledthefood.

聞到食物的香味，我開始流口水了。

③MyheartwasinmymouthwhenIwalkedintoheroffice.

我走進(jìn)她的辦公室時(shí)，緊張得心都提到嗓子眼了。

(6)hand

①Shetookthechild'shandandhelpedhimclimbthesteps.

她拉住孩子的手牽著他爬上臺(tái)階。

②Hereachedforherhandandheldittightly.

他伸手抓住她的手并緊緊握住。

@Sheshruggedandspreadherhands."That'sallIcantellyou.”

她聳聳肩，攤開雙手說(shuō)：“我只能告訴你這么多了?！?/p>

@Shcshivered,rubbingherhandstogetherfiercely.

她一邊顫抖，一邊使勁搓著雙手。

@Herhandsshook/trembledassheliftedtheglasstoherlips.

她的手顫抖著把杯子送到唇邊。

(7)ann

①Hewasrunningforward,wavinghisarms.

他揮舞著胳膊向前跑著。

@Hestoodtherewithcrossedarms,lookingangry.

他交叉著雙臂站在那里，看上去怒氣沖沖。

③Shefoldedherarmsandstaredathim.

她交叉著雙臂注視著他。

第二部分心理描寫

一、心理描寫的2種方法

心理描寫可以揭示人物的內(nèi)心世界，表達(dá)人物的性格、特點(diǎn)、感情和思想等。心理描寫可以運(yùn)用直接描寫和

間接描寫兩種方法。

①直接描寫：直接寫主人公的想法、感受、打算等，在具體寫作時(shí)，可用力同「"shethought”“hewould”等句

式。

②間接描寫：人物的性格不同，情緒不同，其所表現(xiàn)出的動(dòng)作和神態(tài)也就不同，因此可以利用人物的動(dòng)隹和

神態(tài)體現(xiàn)其心理,也可以利用語(yǔ)言措寫表現(xiàn)人物心理。

二、心理描寫的高分素材

(1)表“害怕”的心理

?Mythroattightenedandmykneesfeltweak.

我喉嚨發(fā)緊，雙膝發(fā)軟。

@1frozewithterror,tooscaredtomoveaninch.

我嚇呆了，一動(dòng)也不動(dòng)。

(2)表“憤怒”的心理

?Herfacecloudedwithanger.

她滿臉怒氣。

@Hisvoicetrembledwithanger.

他氣得聲音發(fā)抖。

@Heletoutcriesofanger.

他發(fā)出憤怒的喊聲。

(3)表“悲傷和絕望”的心理

①Hisheartsankatthenews.

聽到這個(gè)消息，他的心一沉。

@Overewithbitterdisappointment,helockedhimselfupinhisroom.

由于極度失望，他把自己鎖在房間里。

③Hewasabruptlythrownintoaworldofdarknessandsankintohopelessness.

他突然被拋進(jìn)一個(gè)黑暗的世界，陷入絕望。

(4)表“尷尬、緊張”的心理

Sweatwaspouringdownmyface.

汗水從我臉上滾落下來(lái)。

(5)表“震驚”的心理

①Shefrozewithshock,asifrootedtothespot.

她吃驚得呆住了，就像在原地生了根似的。

②Hereyeswidenedfurtherandhismouthopened.

她的眼睛睜得更大了，他的嘴張開了。

第三部分對(duì)話描寫

一、對(duì)話描寫的3種表現(xiàn)形式

①提示語(yǔ)在前，如Afewminuteslater,shesaid,"Grandmother,Iamfinishednow.”

②提示語(yǔ)在后，如“HereisSusan!nthegirlscried.

③提示語(yǔ)在中間，如'TdHketogowithyou,“repliedSusan,"butIcannotfinishthetaskgrandmothersetmeto

do.^^

二、對(duì)話描寫的3個(gè)原則

在進(jìn)行續(xù)寫時(shí)，應(yīng)根據(jù)故事情節(jié)發(fā)展和人物特征靈活運(yùn)用對(duì)話描寫優(yōu)化續(xù)寫部分的語(yǔ)言。利用對(duì)話描寫時(shí)，

應(yīng)注重3個(gè)原則。

①控制對(duì)話的比重。對(duì)話雖有助于推動(dòng)故事情節(jié)的發(fā)展，但不能代替故事情節(jié)。讀后續(xù)寫的對(duì)話部分所占比

重不應(yīng)高過(guò)敘事部分的比重。

②對(duì)話內(nèi)容應(yīng)符合人物特點(diǎn)。不同的人物有不同的身份和性格，因此他們的話語(yǔ)應(yīng)與原文人物特點(diǎn)吻合。

③對(duì)話內(nèi)容應(yīng)緊扣原文主旨。所寫對(duì)話應(yīng)圍繞某一中心或話題，且應(yīng)與原文主旨一致，這樣續(xù)寫部分的思路

才是清晰明朗的，才能契合故事情節(jié)的發(fā)展。如果沒有一個(gè)固定的中心，隨意對(duì)話，就會(huì)顯得不知所云，偏離故

事的主題。例如攻略3中的例題第一段中可利用母親與父親的簡(jiǎn)短對(duì)話體現(xiàn)母親健忘的性格。

【典例示例】

閱讀下面材料，根據(jù)其內(nèi)容和所給段落開頭語(yǔ)續(xù)寫兩段，使之構(gòu)成一篇完整的短文。續(xù)寫的詞數(shù)應(yīng)為150

左右。

（2020?浙江1月高考改編）'Tmgoingtomissyousomuch,Poppy,“saidthetall,thinteenager.Hebentdownto

hughisoldfriendgoodbye.Hestoodup,huggedhisparents,andsmiled,tryingnottolethisemotions（情緒）get

thebe:terofhim.

Hisparentswerenotquiteabletokeeptheirsundercontrol.Theyhaddriventheirsonseveralhoursoutoftownto

theuniversitywherehewouldsoonbelivingandstudying.Itwaslimetosaygoodbyefornowatleast.Thefamily

huggedandsmiledthroughmistyeyesandthenlaughed.

Theboyliftedthelastbagontohisshoulder,andflashedabrightsmile.”Iguessthisisit."hesaid."I'llseeyou

backhomeinamonth,okay?”Hisparentsnodded,andtheywatchedashewalkedoutofsightintothecrowdsof

hundredsofstudentsandparents.Theboy'smotherturnedtothedog,“Okay,Poppy,timetogobackhome.”

Thehouseseemedquietasatombwithouttheboylivingthere.Allthatweek,Poppydidn'tseeminterestedinher

dinner,herfavoritetoy,oreveninherdailywalk.Herownersweresadtoo,buttheyknewtheirsonv/oukibebackto

visit.Poppydidn't.

Theyofferedthedogsomeofherfavoritepeanutbuttertreats.Theyevenlethersitonthesofa,buttheoldgirljust

wasn'therusualcheerfulself.Herownersstartedtogetworried,“WhatshouldwedotocheerPoppyup?”askedDad.

"We'vetriedeverything.”

”[haveanidea,butitmightbealittlecrazy?”smiledMom."Withoutanybodyleftinthehousebutus,thisplace

coulduseabitoffun.Let'sgetalittledogforPoppy.”

1（didn'ttakelongbeforetheywalkedthroughthefrontdoorcarryingabigbox.Poppyweledthemhomeasusual,

butwhenshesawthebox,shestopped.Sheputhernoseonit.Hertailbeganwagging（擺動(dòng)）eversoslowly,then

fasterasshecaughtthesmell.

Paragraph1

Dadopenedtheboxandasweetlittledogappeared.

Paragraph2

Afewweekslater,theboyarrivedhomefromtheuniversity.

【描寫刻畫】

1.細(xì)讀原文，明確敘述意圖

原文敘述要去上大學(xué)的男孩和父母和小狗Poppy依依不舍地告別。Poppy自小主人走后便悶悶不樂，對(duì)自

己愛吃的食物也不感興趣。男孩的父母決定找一個(gè)小狗陪伴Poppy=不難推斷出文章旨在描述Poppy是否又開心

起來(lái)。

2.根據(jù)段落開頭語(yǔ)，圍繞原文主旨，確定續(xù)寫情節(jié)

確定敘述意圖后，定位續(xù)寫段落開頭語(yǔ)關(guān)鍵信息分別是“asweetlittledogappeared”和“Afewweekslater,the

boyarrivedhome”可推斷第一段續(xù)寫部分應(yīng)敘述Poppy看到小狗后的反應(yīng)和她的心情變化一是否轉(zhuǎn)憂為喜？

而續(xù)寫部分第二段應(yīng)敘述男孩回到家時(shí)渴望見到Poppy的心情和動(dòng)作，以及見到小狗后的反應(yīng)。

3.體會(huì)原文動(dòng)作、心理和對(duì)話描寫

①具體的動(dòng)作描寫：原文在前三段中利用了大量的動(dòng)作描寫（具體動(dòng)作在原文中已加灰底）描寫一家人道別時(shí)

的依依不舍，同時(shí)利用多次出現(xiàn)的hugged和smiled暗示這一家人濃濃的親情。原文最后一段中的一系列動(dòng)作（加

灰底單詞）生動(dòng)地描述Poppy見到小狗前的反應(yīng)。

②心理描寫：原文前三段中的“tryingnottolethisemotions（情緒）getthebetterofhim"和"notquiteabletokeep

theirsundercontrol"及“mistyeyes''體現(xiàn)男孩和他的父母在離別之際的依依不舍。第4?5段中的形容詞quiet,

interested,sad,worried具體地描述出男孩不在家時(shí)這家人對(duì)男孩的思念以及男孩父母對(duì)Poppy的關(guān)心。

③對(duì)話描寫：原文出現(xiàn)四處對(duì)話描寫，前三段在男孩離開之前的對(duì)話描寫，體現(xiàn)了男孩舍不得離開父母和

Poppy的心情。原文最后三段中的對(duì)話描寫表現(xiàn)了男孩的父母想方設(shè)法想讓Poppy高興起來(lái)的迫切心理。

4.沿用原文語(yǔ)言特點(diǎn)，完成讀后續(xù)寫

原文在動(dòng)作、心理和對(duì)話描寫方面不吝筆墨，因此續(xù)寫部分也應(yīng)著重使用動(dòng)作、心理和對(duì)話描寫。

【參考范文】

Paragraph1

Dadopenedtheboxandasweetlittledogappeared.Poppyjumpedwithjoyal(hesightofthelittledog.She

loweredherheadtowatchitcuriously.Thenshebecamesoexcitedthatsheaccidentallyknockedovertheboxinan

attempttogelcloser.Withtheboxtippingover,outcamethelittleone.whowasnotshyandinstantlygotfamiliarwith

Poppy.Itdidn'ttakelongbeforethetwoplayedaroundthehouse,cheerfullyrunningaftereachother.

Paragraph2

Afewweekslatertheboyarrivedhomefromtheuniversity.Hehadbeenmissinghisparentsandthedogsinceit

wasthefirsttimethathehadbeenawayfromhomeforsuchalongtime.When(heboycaughtsightofPoppy,hewent

rushingtowardthedogandbentdowntogiveherabighug.Suddenly,theboynoticedthelittledog."Ohmygod,who

isthis?”Hisparentslaughedatthelookofsurpriseonhisface.uIt'sPoppy'snewpanion."saidMom.

【檢測(cè)訓(xùn)練】

1.閱讀下面材料，根據(jù)其內(nèi)容和所給段落開頭續(xù)寫兩段，使之構(gòu)成一篇完整的短文。

Anelderlymanhadcollapsedwhilecrossingthestreet,andanambulancesenthimtothehospitalimmediately.

Whenthemancametohimselfnowandagain,herepeatedlycalledforhisson.

Fromawornletterfoundinhispocket,anemergencyroomnurselearnedthathissonwasasoldier.Thenurse

calledtheRedCrossofficeinBrooklynandmadearequestforthesoldiertoberushedtothehospital.Soon,theyoung

manwasfoundandrushedtotheairportintimetoreachhisdyingfather.

Ilwasmideveningwhentheyoungmanwalkedintothehospital.Anurseledtheanxiousmantothebedofthe

cldcilyman.4tYuuisunishcic,“shevvliispcicdlulliccklcilypatient.TheoldpalicnlScycbupcncJunlyaflcishe

repeatedthewordsseveraltimes.Theoldmanwaslooweaksoitwasreallyhardforhimtostayawakeandhecould

vague'yseetheyoungmanstandingbesidehim.

Theoldmanreachedouthishandwithallhisstrengthandtheyoungmanrealizeditandimmediatelyheldit.

Thenursebroughtachairfortheyoungmantositbesidethebed.Theyoungmansatholdingtheoldman'shand

offeringhimwordsofloveandhope,allthroughthenight.Thedyingoldmansaidnothing.Thenursesuggestedthatthe

youngmanmoveawayandrestforawhile,butherefused.Nowand:hcn,sheheardhimsayafewgentlewords.The

dyingmansaidnothing,onlyholdinghisson'shandtightlythroughoutthenight.

Asdawnapproached,theoldmanpeacefullydied.Theyoungmanplacedhislifelesshandonthebedandinformed

thenurse.Whilethenursedidwhatwasnecessary,theyoungmanwaited.Whenshefinishedhertask,thenursebeganto

saywordsofsympathy(heyoungmanneeded.

注意：

1.續(xù)寫詞數(shù)應(yīng)為150詞左右；

2.請(qǐng)按如下格式在答題卡的相應(yīng)位置作答。

Buttheyounfimanshookhishead.

Hereplied,"/knewrightawayhewasnotmyfather."

【參考范文】

Paragraph1:

Bi"Hiemanshookhishead."Thankyou,butwho'sthatman?”heasked.Witheyeswideopen,thenurse

couldn'tgetovertheshockbutstaredattheman,andtherewasadeadlysilencefbrafewseconds.Seeingherpuzzled

look,(hemanshruggedhisshoulders,shookhishead,castuphiseyes,andsaid,“Maybetheyhavegotthewrongman.

Actua.ly,itismonfbrpeopletosharethesamename."Noddingherhead,thenurseaskedwhyhedidn'tsayanythingin

thebeginning.

Paragraph2:

Herenlied.’7knewrighlheiwmvjiuher."Then,afteraquickglanceattheoldman.heturnedbackand

added*“ButIalsoknewthatheneededhissonsomuch.Ididn'tknowhowlonghehadn'tseenhisson,butIknewhe

mustmisshimalot.Assoldiers,wchavetopartourlovedonesforlongtosafeguardourcountry.Althoughheisnotmy

father,Iamhappytoserveashissonfbrthetimebeing,satisfyinghisfinaldesirebeforeleavingthisworld.MThcroom

wassilentagain.

【寫作分析】本文以人物為線索展開，講述了一位老人在過(guò)馬路時(shí)暈倒，被送到醫(yī)院，護(hù)士從他口袋里發(fā)現(xiàn)的一

封破舊的信中得知他的兒子是一名1兵，于是通知_1兵前來(lái)見自己的父親，_L兵一直陪伴著老人宜到他去世，最

后護(hù)士才知道士兵弁不是老人的兒子，士兵說(shuō)自己希望滿足老人直開這個(gè)世界前的最后愿望。

【寫作步驟】

1.段落續(xù)寫：

①由第一段首句內(nèi)容“年輕人搖了搖頭?！翱芍谝欢慰擅鑼懽o(hù)士得知士兵不是老人兒子后的反應(yīng)。

②由第二段首句內(nèi)容“他回答說(shuō)：‘我馬上就知道他不是我父親了。，”可知，第二段可描寫兒子對(duì)自己的行為做出

的解釋是希望滿足老人離開這個(gè)世界前的最后愿望。

2.續(xù)寫線索：年輕人否認(rèn)自己是老人的兒子——護(hù)士吃驚——護(hù)士洵問為什么一開始不說(shuō)實(shí)話——士兵回答希望

滿足老人離開這個(gè)世界前的最后愿望

3.詞匯激活

行為類

恢復(fù)：getover/recover

擔(dān)任：serveas/actas

回答：reply/respond

情緒類

困惑：puzzled/confused

快樂：happy/pleased

【寫作亮點(diǎn)】

[高分句型1]Noddingherhead,thenurseaskedwhyhedidn'tsayany:hinginthebeginning.（運(yùn)用了why引導(dǎo)賓語(yǔ)從

句）

[高分句型2]Althoughheisnotmyfather,Iamhappytoserveashissonfbrthetimebeing,satisfyinghisfinaldesire

beforeleavingthisworld.（運(yùn)用了although引導(dǎo)讓步狀語(yǔ)從句）

2.閱讀下面材料，根據(jù)其內(nèi)容和所給段落開頭語(yǔ)續(xù)寫兩段，使之構(gòu)成一篇完整的短文。

Ilallbeganwhenmyyoungerbrother,Chris,andIwentovertoAuntBarbaraandUncleHoward'sfbr

Thanksgiving.MyauntanduncleliveonafarmandChrisandIlovegoingthere.Oneday.UncleHowardhandedme

twoturkeyeggs.

“Youkidsputthoseunderasettinghen/'hesaid,“andintwentyfivedays,you'llhaveacoupleoffineturkeys!”

Chriswassoexcitedthathencaiiydroppedhiseggonthewaytothehouse.Wcbothstuffedourselvesatdinner

andthencouldn'twaittogohomeandtendtooureggs.

Twentyfivedaysseemedlikeforever.Finally,onthetwentysixthday,ChrisandIwalkedintothecoopafterschool

andspottedtwoballsofflu工fallingovertheirieetandlookingsortofconfused.Itwasn'tlongbeforethechickslost

theirfuzzandbegangrowingfeathers.ChrisnamedoneBill,andInamedtheotherTimothy.

Idon'tknowwhathappened,butonedaywefoundBilldeadbesidethecoop.Chrisfeltterrible.Itoldhimthat

fromnowon,Timothybelongedtohim,too.

MomkepttellingusnottogettooattachedtoTimothy,becauseweweregoingtohavehimforThanksgiving.But

weneverpaidloomuchattentiontowhatthatreallymeant.

Then,onedaytowardtheendofOctober,DadpennedTimothyupandgaveChrisandmeinstructions.

wantyoutostartgivinghimcomalongwithhisregularfeed/hesaid."Wewantanice,fatbirdfbr

Thanksgiving/'AfterDadturnedandwalkedaway,Chrisbegantocry.

“Don'tworry,Chris,“Isaidfbrtingly.44WellsaveTimothy,somehow.”

“Whydon'twegivehimaway?”Chrissuggested.

“No,"Isaid.uIfwedo,he'lljustenduponsomeoneelse,sThanksgivingtable.”

“Whatifwetakehimoutinthewoods?”

“Healwaysesbackatnight,“Isaid.Webothsighed.

注意：

1.續(xù)寫詞數(shù)應(yīng)為150左右；

2.請(qǐng)按照如卜格式在答題卡的相應(yīng)位置作答。

Paragraph1:

SuddenlyIhadanidea.

Paragraph2:

Toourastonishment,Timothywasgone!

【參考范文】

Paragraph1:

Si4dden/vIhadanidea."Hey,Chris,youknowthatsmallcaveinthewoods?”Chrisnodded.tlWecantakeTimothy

there.WellhidehimtillThanksgivingisover."Feelingsoexcited,wejumpedupandgaveeachotherhighfives.The

nextdayafterschool,weleftTimothyinthecavewithanoldpeanutbuttercanfilledwithwater,andplentyoffood.We

piledbrushovertheopeningtohidetheentrance.

Paragraph2:

7bcurasionishmeni,Timo""八us皿田Chrisbegantocry.Wesatthereforawhilewonderingwhathadhappened

tohiir.ThoughIhatedtoadmitit,mythroatsuddenlyhurt.WhenvvewentbackandMomsawIwasabouttocry,she

calmedusdown,andwetoldhereverything.Asspringapproached,onedayChrisandIwereplayinginsidewhenwe

heardMomscreaming,4*Lookatthat!It'sTimothy.lieisback!^^

【寫作分析】本文以人物為線索展開，講述了作者的叔叔給了作者和弟弟兩只小雞，小雞孵化后，弟弟的小雞卻

死了，于是作者把自己的雞交給弟弟飼養(yǎng)。十月底的一天，父親告訴作者他們要把那只雞殺死做感恩節(jié)晚餐，他

們不愿意，于是作者他們把雞藏到了山洞里，結(jié)果雞卻跑了，作者和弟弟非常傷心，最后在一個(gè)春天雞又回到了

家里。

【寫作步驟】

1.段落續(xù)寫：

①由第一段首句內(nèi)容“突然我有了一個(gè)主意。''可知，第一段可描寫作者想出了什么方法來(lái)救這只雞，以及他們是

如何做的。

②由第二段首句內(nèi)容“令我們驚訝的是，Timothy不見了！”可知，第二段可描寫雞走后作者和弟弟的反應(yīng)，以及

雞最后回到了家里。

2.續(xù)寫線索：作者想出辦法一作者和弟弟藏雞一雞不見了一作者和弟弟傷心一作者和弟弟回到家里告訴

真相——雞回來(lái)

3.詞匯激活

行為類

隱藏：hide/conceal

開始:beginto/startto

裝滿:filledwith/fullof

情緒類

驚訝：toone'saslonishniunt/toone,ssurprise

激動(dòng)：excited/thrilled

【寫作亮點(diǎn)】

[高分句型I]Feelingsoexcited,wejumpedupandgaveeachotherhighfives.（運(yùn)用了現(xiàn)在分詞作狀語(yǔ)）

[高分句型2]ThoughIhatedtoadmitit,mythroatsuddenlyhurt.（運(yùn)用/though引導(dǎo)讓步狀語(yǔ)從句）

3.閱讀下面材料,根據(jù)其內(nèi)容和所給段落開頭語(yǔ)續(xù)寫兩段，使之構(gòu)成一篇完整的短文。

U.SikemostU.Snationalparks,Evergladesnationalpark,locatedinsouthFlorida,wascreatedtoprotectafragile

ecosystem（生態(tài)系統(tǒng)）insteadofsafeguardingauniquegeographicfeature.Itisaheavenforawiderangeofwildlife,

suchasturtles,snakes,lizards,theGrassfrog.Wadingbirdsandsoon.amongwhicharefierceAmericanalligators（鱷

魚）.Ilissaidthatsomeofthealligatorsoftenappearintheareaswherepeoplelive,causingmuchdamage.

Aterribleincidenthappenedonahotsummerday.Itwassohotadaythatnearlyeveiyonefeltlikejumpinginto

thecoolwater.Alittleboysimplycouldn'tputupwiththeheat,decidingtogofbraswimintheoldswimminghole

behindhishouse.

“Mum,itbeingsohot,Iwanttohaveaswim."theboytoldhismotherwhilewalkingout.

“No,Honey,therehasbeenawarningthatanalligatorIrointheparkhasappearedinthesurroundingarea.Itis

dangerous!”saidhismotherinaloudvoice.Butthelittleboyrushedoutofthebackdoorlikeagustofwindbeforehis

mothercouldstophim.

Hewasinsuchahurrytodiveintothecoolwaterthatheleftbehindshoes,socks,andshirtasheleft.

Heflewintothewaterandenjoyedthefbrtablefeelingthatthecoolwaterbroughthim,notrealizingthatashe

swamtowardthemiddleofthelake,analligatorwasswimmingtowardhim.Hismotherwaspreparingdinnerinthe

kitchenwhensuddenlyshecaughtthetwogettingcloserandclosertoeachotherasshewaslookingoutofthewindow.

“Oh,MyGod^^^shecouldn'thelpcryingloudly,gettingintoagreatpanic.Andtheningreatfear,sherantowardthe

water,shoutingtohersonasloudlyasshecouldalltheway,“Alligalor,AHigalor!”

Hearinghervoice,thelittleboybecamealarmedandmadeaUturntoswimtohismother.However,itwastoolate.

Somethinghorriblewashappening.

注意：1.續(xù)寫詞數(shù)應(yīng)為150左右；

2.請(qǐng)按如下格式在在答題卡的相應(yīng)位置作答。

Justasheapproachedher,thealligatorreachedhim.

Remarkably,afterweeksinthehospital,thelittleboysurvived.

【參考范文】

Possibleversion1：

Justasheapproachedher,thealligatorreachedhim.Fromtheshore,themothergrabbedherlittleboytightlybythe

armsjustasthealligatorsnatchedhislegs.Itseemedasifitwereanincredibletugofwarbetweenthetwo.Thealligator

wasmuchstrongerthanthemother,but(hemotherwasmuchtoodevotedtoletgo.Fortunately,afarmerhappenedto

driveby.Hearingtheirscreams,heracedfromhistruck,tookaimandshot(healligator.Seriouslywounded,theboywas

rushedtothehospital.

Remarkably,afterweeksinthehospital,thelittleboysurvived.Hislegswereextremelyscarredbytheattackofthe

animal.Andonhisarmsweredeepscratches,wherehismother'sfingernailsdugintohisfleshinherefforttoholdonto

thesonsheloved.Whenaskedtoshowhisscars,theboyliftedhislegsandthenwithobviouspride,hesaidtopeople

ingtoseehim,“Butlookatmyarms.Ihavegreatscarsonmyarms,too.Ihavethembecausemymomwouldn'tletgo.^^

Possibleversion2：

Justasheapproachedher,ihealligatorreachedhim.Deeplyshockedby(heterriblescene,motherrushedtoherson,

catchingholdofhimtightly,withallhermight.However,thealligatorwasmuchstrongerihanthemother.Inspiteof

this,motherwassodeterminedthatshewouldn'tletgoofherson,screamingfbrhelpatthesametime.Hearingthe

frighteningcry.aneighborrushedout.withaguninhishand,tookaimandthenshotthealligator.Thsboygotsaved,

butseriouslyinjured.

Remarkably,afterweeksinthehospital,thelittleboysurvived.Seeinghismotherandtheneighborsittingbeside

him,theboyhuggedhismother,withtearsinhiseyes,feelinggreatlyregretfulthathedidn'tlistentoher.Bothofthem

expressedsinceregratitudetotheneighbor.Withouthim,thesonwouldhavelosthislife.Andtlientheneighbor

suggestedputtingupawarningsignatthesideofthelaketoinformothersofthedanger.Theboyunderstoodthe

significanceofsafetyfromthenon.

【寫作分析】本文是一篇記敘文。文章主要講述了在一個(gè)炎熱的夏天，一個(gè)小男孩不顧媽媽的反對(duì)和警告，到房

了后面的一個(gè)舊水潭里去游泳，被一條鱷魚追擊，媽媽看到這一幕后，恐懼地跑向水邊，邊向小男孩大喊，邊盡

力去救他。在與鱷魚的拉鋸戰(zhàn)中，媽媽沒有放棄，并在過(guò)路的人的幫助之下，救下了小男孩，將他送往醫(yī)院。

【寫作步驟】

范文一

1.段落續(xù)寫：

①由第一段首句內(nèi)容“Justasheapproachedher,thealligatorreachedhim.（當(dāng)他游近她的時(shí)候,鱷魚已經(jīng)靠近了他。）”

可知，第一段可描寫媽媽與鱷魚在爭(zhēng)奪小男孩之間的“拉扯”，一個(gè)出于母愛，一個(gè)出于“饑餓”，不相上下，最終

有人替助救下小男孩。

②由第二段首句內(nèi)容“Remarkably,af:erweeksinthehospital,thelittleboysurvived/經(jīng)過(guò)幾周的住院治療，小男孩竟

然活了下來(lái)。戶可知，第二段可描寫這次鱷魚攻擊對(duì)于小男孩留下的傷疤，以及他的感受。

2.續(xù)寫線索：媽媽拉住小男孩一鱷魚抓住小男孩的腿一媽媽和鱷魚的拉鋸戰(zhàn)——有人幫助一小男孩獲救送

往醫(yī)院一鱷色攻擊后的傷疤一男孩對(duì)于媽媽極力救自己的感受

3.詞匯激活

行為類

①.抓住：grab/snatch/catch/holdonto

②.奔跑：run/race/rush

③.（使）受傷：wound/scar

情緒類

①.深愛：devoted/love

程度類

①.緊緊地：tighily/fimily

②.非常/竟然：incrcdible/rcmarkably/extremely/inuch

【寫作亮點(diǎn)】

[高分句型1].Fromtheshore,themothergrabbedherlittleboytightlybythearmsjustasthealligatorsnatchedhis

legs.（媽媽在岸上緊緊地抓住小男孩的手臂，而此時(shí)鱷魚也死死地咬住了小男孩的腿。）

句子中使用了“（just）as”引導(dǎo)時(shí)間狀語(yǔ)從句。

[高分句型2].Andonhisannsweredeepscratches,wherehismother'sfingernailsdugintohisfleshinherefforttohold

ontothesonsheloved.（他的手臂上有深深的抓痕，那是他的媽媽為了抓住她深愛的兒子而川指甲摳進(jìn)他的肉里的

地方。）句子使用“where”引導(dǎo)非限制性定語(yǔ)從句。

4.閱讀下面短文，根據(jù)所給情節(jié)進(jìn)行續(xù)寫，使之構(gòu)成一個(gè)完整的故事。

WhenIwas19,IspentpartofmysummeratanadventurecanwonVancouverIsland,supervising（照料）agroup

of105earoldgirls.Towardstheendofthefirstweek,Itookthemonacamping.Bysixintheevening,we'dclimbeda

smallmountain.Thepeakhadtreesononesideandbaldrockontheother.IletthegirlsplayinthewoodedareawhileI

arrangedthingsfordinner.

Whenthescreamingstarted,Iwasn'ttooalannedlcouldseemygrouptearingthroughthebushandthoughtthey'd

justdisturbedabees'nest.Asthefirstgirlappeared,Iaskedwhatwasgoingon."Wildcat!”shegasped.Theimageinmy

headwasofahousecatgonewild,butwithhernextbreathsheadded,“It'sattackingAlyson.^^Itoldthegirlstoclimbon

totherocksandthenrantowherethey'dbeenplaying.Alysonwaslyingbybush.Shewasonherback,eyeswide,

staringatahugecatbesideher.Thecatwaswatchingme.

Anyonefamiliarwithwesternswillhaveseenacougar（美洲獅）一themountainlionthatspringsfromtherock

fiiceontothepasserby.We'dbeentoldhowtodealwithbears:"Keepstill,backup,makeyourselflookbig."Butwe

hadn'tcoveredcougars.Igrabbedastickandswungitintotheanimal'sface.Startled,ittookoffintothebushes.

SeeingihaiAlysonwashurt,Isetoffforthefirstaidbox,buthadn'tgonefourstepswhenIheardamoan.Turning

back,Isawthecougarcrouched（蹲伏jbyAlyson'shead.Itappearedtobeeatingher.ThistimeIusedabiggerstick,hit

harderandheldon.Onceagain,itdisappeared,andIkneltbyAlyson.

“There'snowaysomeonecanlivethroughthis,“1thought.Thecathadtorndeepintoherneck.Shehadlongcuts

onherface.uAmIgoingtodie?”sheasked.Herheartbeatwasracingbutweak,thesignofahearttremblingfrom

shock.

注意：

1.所續(xù)寫短文的詞數(shù)應(yīng)為150左右；

2.至少使用5個(gè)短文中標(biāo)有下劃線的關(guān)鍵詞語(yǔ)；

3.續(xù)寫部分分為兩段，每段的開頭語(yǔ)已為你寫好；

4.續(xù)寫完成后，請(qǐng)用下劃線標(biāo)出你所便用的關(guān)解詞語(yǔ)。

Paragraph1:

44You'renotgoingtodie,"Isaid.

Paragraph2:

FrommybranchIcouldseesomepeoplemovingonanearbymountain.

【參考范文】

Paragraph1:

“You'renotgoingtodie,“Isaid.ItookoffmyTshirtandgotAlysontoholditagainstherneck,thenranforthe

firslaidkitandasleepingbag.Theothergirlsstaredfromtheirrock.^Everything'sfine!^^Iyelled.ThenIrealisedI

couldn'tleavetogethelp,orrisksendinganyoneelse.Iwasterrified;Iwantedsobadlytorunaway,butknewthat

wasn'tanoption.Instead,Iclimbedatree,wonderingwhetherIcouldbeluckyenoughtoseekhelpanywhere.

Paragraph2:

Fromniybranch1couldseesomeDCODICmovingvnanearbymounlain.Theywereanothergroupofcampers.I

criedout,"Help!Cougarattack!”Helpeventuallyarrived.Anothercounsellor,John,hadsenthisboystoraisethealairn

whileherantous.Asdarknessfell,ahelicopterarrivedtoliftAlysonoffthemountain,andtherestofuswereaepanied

downhilltoawaitingtruck.Alysonrecoveredslowly.Allthatmademechoose“fight"over"flight"wasthethoughtof

Alysonbeingeatenalive.

【寫作分析】本文以人物為線索展開，講述了作者19歲時(shí)帶一群10歲左右的女孩們野營(yíng)，不幸被獅子襲擊，作

者沒有逃避，而是勇敢地保護(hù)了孩子們，但還是有一個(gè)女孩Alyson受傷非常嚴(yán)重。

【寫作步驟】

1.段落續(xù)寫:

①由第一段首句內(nèi)容““你不會(huì)死的，“我說(shuō)。“可知，第一段可描寫，‘乍者盡力拯救Alyson,安撫其他女孩，雖然自

己也很害怕想逃走，但作者還是留下幫忙。

②由第二段首句內(nèi)容“從我站的樹枝上，我可以看到一些人在附近的山上移動(dòng)?！笨芍诙慰擅鑼懽髡呖吹搅?/p>

另一群露營(yíng)者，向他們尋求幫助，Alyson得救，大家也安全了。

2.續(xù)寫線索：急救和安撫——恐懼想逃跑——留下和求救——救援到來(lái)——大家安全

3.詞匯激活

行為類

①叫喊：yelled/shouted/cried

②到達(dá)：arrived/reached

③發(fā)出警報(bào)：raisethealarm/soundthealarm

情緒類

①害怕：terrifled/frightened/scared

【寫作亮點(diǎn)】

[高分句型1].Instead,Iclimbedatree,wonderingwhetherIcouldbeluckyenoughtoseekhelpanywhere.（由連接詞

whether引導(dǎo)的賓語(yǔ)從句作wonder的賓語(yǔ)）

[高分句型2].Allthatmademechoose"fight”over“flight”wasthethoughtofAlysonbeingeatenalive.（由關(guān)系代詞

that弓導(dǎo)限制性定語(yǔ)從句）

5.閱讀下面材料，根據(jù)其內(nèi)容和所給段落開頭語(yǔ)續(xù)寫兩段，使之構(gòu)成一篇完整的短文。

Oneday,apoorboywhowastryingtopayhiswaythroughschoolbysellinggoodsdoortodoorfoundthatheonly

hadonedimeleft.Hewashungrysohedecidedtobegforamealatthenexthouse.

However,helosthisnervewhenalovelyyoungwomanopenedthedoor.Insteadofamealheaskedforadrinkof

water.Shethoughthelookedhungrysoshebroughthimalargeglassofmilk.Hedrankitslowly,andthenasked,“How

muchdoIoweyou?"

“Youdon'towemeanything,“shereplied.44Motherhastaughtmenevertoacceptpayforakindness.Hesaid,

“ThenIthankyoufromthebottomofmyheart.44AsHowardKellyleftthathouse,henotonlyfeltstrongerphysically,

butitalsoincreasedhisfaithinkindnessandthehumanrace.Hewasabouttogiveupandquitbeforethispoint.

Yearslatertheyoungwomanbecamecriticallyill.Thelocaldoctorswerebaffled.Theyfinallysenthertothebig

city,wherespecialistscanbecalledintostudyherraredisease.Dr.HowardKelly,nowfamous,wascalledinforthe

consultation.Whenheheardthenameofthetownshecamefrom,astrangelightfilledhiseyes.Immediately,herose

andwentdownthroughthehospitalhallintoherroom.

注意：I.續(xù)寫詞數(shù)應(yīng)為150詞左右；

2.請(qǐng)按如下格式作答。

Dressedinhisdoctorsgownhewentintoseeher.

Thebillwassenttoherroom.

【參考范文】

Dressedinhisdoctorsgownhewentintoseeher.Herecognizedheratonce.Hewentbacktotheconsultation

roomanddeterminedtodohisbesttosaveherlife.Fromthatdayon,hegavespecialattentiontoher