20131無老師滿分范例:Also,studentswouldeasilyedisorientedinthehugeseaofinformation.Althoughmoderntechnologycouldequipuswitheasyaccesstoinformation,thehugeamountofresourceswouldactuallyleaveusbobulated.Therefore,itisonlylefttopossessinformationmorequicklyratherthanlearnitmorequickly.AnillustratingexampleismyexperiencewithaHKdigitallibrarywhichstoresalmostallthebooksIdesire.AtfirstIenjoyeddownloadingthemfromthedatabase.However,onemonthlaterIendedupwithhundredsofbooksstoredinmyhardwareyetnoneofthemfinishedoreverclicked.無老師平庸范例：Also,whenwefaceplentyofinformation,studentswouldeasilylosttheirdirection.Althoughthemoderntechnologyhelpsusgetmoreinformation,somuchinformationwilldistractus.Sowejustcollecttheseinformationbutwedonotabsorbtheseinformation.ThebestexampleisthemyexperienceintheHKdigitallibrary,thislibraryalmosthaveallthebooksthatIlike.Atfirst,Ilikedtodownloadtheseinformation.However,afteramonth,whenhundredsofbookswerestoredinmyhardwareandnoneofthemwereopenedorevenwereclicked,Istopstoppedthisbehavior.首先第一句：優(yōu)秀范例Also,studentswouldeasily edisorientedinthehugeseaofinformation.對比平庸范例Also,whenwefaceplentyofinformation,studentswouldeasilylosttheirdirection.我們就會發(fā)現(xiàn)人家優(yōu)秀范例明明幾個詞就mountainpeople，mountainseaO(∩_∩)O~平庸范例雖然寫的plentyoflosttheirdirection接下來優(yōu)秀范例說了Althoughmoderntechnologycouldequipuswitheasyaccesstoinformation,thehugeamountofresourceswouldactuallyleaveusbobulatedAlthoughthemoderntechnologyhelpsusgetmoreinformationsomuchinformationwilldistractus.equipeasyaccesstoequip是“裝備”的意思，自然也就“使得有了XXX能力”，然后accessto也學(xué)生很少用到的固定搭配，這兩個兩點放在一 了，不如平庸范例distract來得簡單，還是讓人有些遺憾的。第三句：優(yōu)秀范例Therefore,itisonlylefttopossessinformationmorequicklyratherthanlearnitmorequicklySowejustcollecttheseinformation,butwedonotabsorbtheseinformation.這里顯然優(yōu)秀范例的亮點是下面，優(yōu)秀范例AnillustratingexampleismyexperiencewithaHKdigitallibrarywhichstoresalmostallthebooksIdesire.對比平庸范例的ThebestexampleisthemyexperienceintheHKdigitallibrary,thislibraryalmosthaveallthebooksthatIlike2illustratingexample、令人信服！然后的which從句與前一句很緊密，一氣呵成，讓人讀起來頗有很順暢的感覺。但是反觀平庸范例的翻譯只是在邯鄲學(xué)步而已。bestexample是大家都知道的，HKdigitallibrary是直接過來的，thislibrary單獨成句，顯然沒有which從句的AtfirstIenjoyeddownloadingthemfromthedatabase.Atfirst,Ilikedtodownloadtheseinformation.，顯然優(yōu)秀范例的database顯示出作者詞匯量不錯。最后一句，優(yōu)秀范例However,onemonthlaterIendedupwithhundredsofbooksstoredinmyhardwareyetnoneofthemfinishedoreverclicked.對比平庸However,afteramonth,whenhundredsofbookswerestoredinmyhardwareandnoneofthemwereopenedorevenwereclicked,Istopstoppedthisbehavior.20132無老師滿分范例:Another fortofourageisthatweareexperiencinginteralalienation.Withthedevelopmentofcommunicationtechnology,peopleinfact ealienatedwithfriendsandrelatives,sincetheycouldbemerelyaccessedviaphoneor.Toooftenwefeelthatfewofourfriendsaretruefriends,withoutthetraditionalfeelingofmutualaffectionwhichcouldonlybecreatedbylongtimeapart.Butseveraldecadesago,peopletreasuredtheirfriendsandmaintainedrelativelycloseinter relations,whichismuoreenjoyablethantheestrangementsweare無老師平庸范例：Theseconddisadvantageofthisgenerationisthatweareindifferent.Withthedevelopmentofthecommunication,peopleare moreandmoreindifferentwithourfriendsandrelatives,becauseweonlyconnectbyephoneand.webarelyfeelthattherearenotrealfriends,becausewehavelefteachothertoolong,andwelostthetraditionalfeelingofpayingattentiontoeachother.Butmanyyearsago,peoplewillpayattentiontotheirfriends,andkeepthegoodrelationwiththeirfriends,andthesewillmuchbetterthanthedisconnectedrelationbetweenpeople. fortofourageisthatweareexperiencinginter alalienation.對比平庸范例：Theseconddisadvantageofthisgenerationisthatweareindifferent.這個平庸范例簡直就是慘不忍睹??！首先 fort這個詞，不像是平庸范例僅僅給出了 fort，這就很準(zhǔn)確，不僅如此，優(yōu)秀范例后面的alienation則Withthedevelopmentofcommunicationtechnology,peopleinfactealienatedwithfriendsandrelatives,sincetheycouldbemerelyaccessedviaphoneor.對比平庸范例的Withthedevelopmentofthecommunication,peopleare ingmoreandmoreindifferentwithourfriendsandrelatives,becauseweonlyconnectbyephoneand.首先“Withthedevelopmentofcommunicationtechnology”與“Withthedevelopmentofthecommunication”僅差一個technology，到底孰優(yōu)孰劣真的是見仁見智，有的認(rèn)為前者更的access和via則真的是星光熠熠！首先很多考友很難想到用access這個詞來表示XXXvia第三句，優(yōu)秀范例寫的是：Toooftenwefeelthatfewofourfriendsaretruefriends,withoutthetraditionalfeelingofmutualaffectionwhichcouldonlybecreatedbylongtimeapartwebarelyfeelthattherearenotrealfriends,becausewehavelefteachothertoolong,andwelostthetraditionalfeelingofpayingattentiontoeachother.顯然優(yōu)秀范例為了增加句子toooften出一個without，好像是平淡無奇，但是實際上，仔細(xì)讀下，我們就會發(fā)現(xiàn)里面其實隱含著一種因果關(guān)系，就是因為without，所以我們才會感覺到真正的朋友的稀少，這是很多輯關(guān)系詞來表示邏輯！然后再接下來的mutual只能說是樓主的詞匯量豐富，但是后面的affectionaffection了這樣的詞，可以顯示出作者對于教育能力非常的好！然后優(yōu)秀范例又用了becreated最后一句，優(yōu)秀范例Butseveraldecadesago,peopletreasuredtheirfriendsandmaintainedrelativelycloseinter alrelations,whichismuoreenjoyablethantheestrangementsweareexperiencing.對比平庸范例Butmanyyearsago,peoplewillpayattentiontotheirfriends,andkeepthegoodrelationwiththeirfriends,andthesewillmuchbetterthanthedisconnectedrelationbetweenpeople.顯然平庸范例很扭捏的寫出了manyyears，面對優(yōu)秀范例的severaldecades，幾乎無地自容！然后接下來優(yōu)秀范例很霸氣的用到了treasure的動詞詞詞性，是一種很顯然的高等級的！然后優(yōu)秀范例給出了maintainedrelativelycloseinteralrelations這一串組合拳，顯然沒一個詞都不算是很難的詞，甚至closeinter al是最難想到的，至于前面加的relatively，則是一種這種水平的必然選擇。至于接下來，那就兇悍了！首先moreenjoyablethan這就是我們很少能想到的用法，其實有點類似于prefer或者aremorelikely，當(dāng)然prefer我們已經(jīng)很少用到20133無老師滿分范例：Thelastfactorthathasmadeourageso fortableistheabusiveuseoftechnology.Althoughitbringsmuchconvenience,itessentiallychangeshuman–wearenolongerthemasteroftools,butinsteadtheslavesofdevices.Werushtometrostationinordertocatchanearlytrain,sitinfrontofradioactivecomputersalldaylonginordertogetourworkdone,andstayinair-conditionedroomsallsummerwithoutexperiencingthenaturalchangesoutsidethickcementwalls.Severaldecadesago,peoplecouldstillliveclosertonatureandmakerationaluseofmoderntechnology,whichtomeistheessenceofhumanlivingexperience.無老師優(yōu)秀中文翻譯：最后一個使我們這個時代如此的不舒服是對科技的。雖然相反，我們變成了工具的。我們匆忙地奔向地鐵站，就是為了趕上早班的火車，整天無老師平庸范例：Thelastreasonthatmakesme fortableistheabuseofthetechnology.Althoughitbringsmuchconvenience,itgreatlychangesourlife.Wearenolongerownerofthetools,onthecontrary,we etheslaveofthetools.Wecometothestationtocatchuptheearlytrain,sitinfrontofthecomputertodoourjob,stayintheair-conditionerroom,anddonotenjoythechangeofthenatureoutsidethecementwall.Manyyearsago,humanlivecloselywiththenature,andusethetechnologycleverly,andthatisthenatureoflifeforme.差距，就使兩者相差得越來越大了。因此我們下面的篇幅，的是來分析作者的優(yōu)秀范第一句，優(yōu)秀范例：Thelastfactorthathasmadeouragesofortableistheabusiveuseoftechnology.對比平庸范例：Thelastreasonthatmakesmefortableistheabuseofthetechnology.優(yōu)秀范例和平庸范例都用了從句的方式來表達(dá)這句話，，但是差別在于優(yōu)秀范例之中作者能想到3個細(xì)節(jié)點，是它的亮點，第一、age，第二、so，第三、abusiveuseage第二句，優(yōu)秀范例Althoughitbringsmuchconvenience,itessentiallychangeshuman–wearenolongerthemasteroftools,butinsteadtheslavesofdevices.對比平庸范例Althoughitbringsmuchconvenience,itgreatlychangesourlife.Wearenolongerownerofthetools,onthecontrary,we etheslaveofthetools.其實優(yōu)秀范例，僅就句式來說，并沒有什么很有亮點的地方，優(yōu)秀范例的有點主要是在于用詞和想法取勝。首先，bringsmuchconvenience說實話真的挺俗的，但是后面的essentially一詞用的很好，表示本質(zhì)上的，根本上的。但是平庸范例只能想到greatly這個詞，實在是詞匯量太貧乏，筒子們，看什么看，還不趕快拿小本記下 ”，這一點令我們印象深刻。然后再接下來一個固定搭配，notbut，增加沒有繼續(xù)的用tool而是換用了device，也算是小亮點。Werushtometrostationinordertocatchanearlytrain,sitinfrontofradioactivecomputersalldaylonginordertogetourworkdone,andstayinair-conditionedroomsallsummerwithoutexperiencingthenaturalchangesoutsidethickcementwallsWecometothestationtocatchuptheearlytrain,sitinfrontofthecomputertodoourjob,stayintheair-conditionerroom,anddonotenjoythechangeofthenatureoutside的趕到車站，用詞非常準(zhǔn)確！然后再接下來metro一詞用的很地道，應(yīng)該廣州和的筒是一個敗筆，但是用radioactive一次寫出了這里面的危害，很漂亮！不僅如此，inorderto，而不僅僅是一個簡單的to，顯示出作者詞匯量的豐富。其后，air-withoutbutnot，則是顯示出行文已經(jīng)比較成熟了，是的Severaldecadesago,peoplecouldstillliveclosertonatureandmakerationaluseofmoderntechnology,whichtomeistheessenceofhumanlivingexperienceManyyearsago,humanlivecloselywiththenature,andusethetechnologycleverlyandthatisthenatureoflifeforme.首先，優(yōu)秀范例又是拋出了優(yōu)秀作文常用的decade，好吧，敗給你了。然后makerationaluseofrationalmakeuseof個固定搭配配合得很好，真是！最后的tome首先限定出了作用的范圍，然后的the20134無老師優(yōu)秀范例：Butthenormthata“good”productisadvertisedasa“better”oneisoftenchallengedorevenreversed–thatis,unscrupulousbusinessmenmakeuseofadvertisingtosellinferiorproducts,whichraisesamoralquestion.Forexample,mymotherwasonceattractedbyacommercialofaencyclopediawhichwaedtobetheoneandonlycompleteversionofseveralancientChineses.Sherushedtotheshopandboughtthis“l(fā)imitedversion”ataeye-popprice,andregardeditasoneofthemostpreciousthingsinourhouse.However,afewmonthslatershefoundthesameversionwassoldinbulkatanothershopatanunbelievablylowprice,whichannoyedherforquitealongtime.Wecanlearnfromtheexperiencethatweshouldnotalwaystrusttheadvertisementsthatareapparentlyexaggeratingproducts,andkeepalertintheswarmofevisioncommercials.無老師平庸范例：Thebehaviorthatweboostthegoodthingsintogreatthingsisalwayscriticizedandeventurnedover,thatis,thosebad setheadvertisementtosellbadthings,whiakesamoralquestion.Forexample,mymotherwasattractedbyaadvertisementofencyclopaedia,theysaytheencyclopaediaistheone,andtheencyclopaediaistheonlyfullversionofChinesepapers.Thensherantothebookstore,andboughtthislimitedversioninveryhighprice,andthinkitisthemostimportantthinginmyhouse.Butafewmonthslater,shesawthesamebookinanotherbookstore,andthebookstoresolditinverylowprice,andshewasveryunhappy.Wecanlearnthatweshouldnotalwaystrustadvertisements,andweshouldbecarefuloftheadvertisements.首先優(yōu)秀范例的第一句：Butthenormthata“good”productisadvertisedasa“better”oneisoftenchallengedorevenreversed–thatis,unscrupulousbusinessmenmakeuseofadvertisingtosellinferiorproducts,whichraisesamoralquestion.對比平庸范例Thebehaviorthatweboostthegoodthingsintogreatthingsisalwayscriticizedandeventurnedover,thatis,thosebad setheadvertisementtosellbadthings,whiakesamoral能稍微沾一點“做事方式”的意思，然后接下來平庸范例的boost，與優(yōu)秀范例的better是good的，本身是有比前者good更好的感覺存在的，great雖然也表示makeuseof，大亮點！而且優(yōu)秀范例接下來還不落俗套的用到了inferior和raise這兩Forexample,mymotherwasonceattractedbyacommercialofaencyclopediawhichwaedtobetheoneandonlycompleteversionofseveralancientChineses.對比平庸范例Forexample,mymotherwasattractedbyaadvertisementofencyclopaedia,theysaytheencyclopaediaistheone,andtheencyclopaediaistheonlyfullversionofChinesepapers.優(yōu)秀來優(yōu)秀范例用了waedtobe，我們很少能想到這樣的用法，有加分！最后對比平庸范例，顯然在表述唯一的時候，平庸范例很笨拙的翻譯為encyclopaediaistheone,andtheencyclopediaistheonly，顯然的中式表達(dá)，不過其實這里最大的亮點是theoneandonlyancient和，保證了整句的水準(zhǔn)。第三句優(yōu)秀范例則是整段最大的亮點Sherushedtotheshopandboughtthis“l(fā)imitedversion”ataeye-popprice,andregardeditasoneofthemostpreciousthingsinourhouseThensherantothebookstore,andboughtthislimitedversioninveryhighprice,andthinkitisthemostimportantthinginmyhouse.首先用到的一個小詞rush，表示出的匆匆忙忙的這個感就是ataeye-popprice一個讓眼睛瞪出來的價格！表示價格非常的高！顯然非常具但是就沒有ataeye-popprice這么形象了。其后，第四句話，優(yōu)秀范例However,afewmonthslatershefoundthesameversionwassoldinbulkatanothershopatanunbelievablylowprice,whichannoyedherforquitealongtime.相比于平庸范例Butafewmonthslater,shesawthesamebookinanotherbookstore,andthebookstoresolditinverylowprice,andshewasveryunhappyversioninbulksoldlimitedversion課釘子，呼應(yīng)前面的ataeye-popprice，寫得很漂亮。最后作者又亮出了annoy這最后一句話，優(yōu)秀范例Wecanlearnfromtheexperiencethatweshouldnotalwaystrusttheadvertisementsthatareapparentlyexaggeratingproducts,andkeepalertintheswarmofevisioncommercials.對比平庸范例Wecanlearnthatweshouldnotalwaystrustadvertisementsandweshouldbecarefuloftheadvertisements.顯然作者在這里沒有很平淡的直接寫welearnthatfrom過在詞匯的運用上倒是亮點頗多，apparently，exaggerating，swarm都顯示出作者的詞匯量豐富，尤其是最后的keepalertin和evisioncommercial更是顯示出作者的積20135無老師優(yōu)秀范例：What’smore,eventhoughIamtrulyafoodlover,Ivaluemoreaboutthehistoricalandartmeaningofthesites.AsaChineseoldsayinggoes,travelingtenthousandandreadingtenthousandbooksisthetopideaforpeople.Thesitesarelikehugehistorybookslyingthere,waitingforustoread.Theyleadusintoagreatartclass,showinguseithernaturalsightsortheextremelyskillfulartificialities.Besides,thepurposefortravelistoextendmyoutlooks.Foodiscertainlyonewaytodothat,butitonlyconstitutesasmallpartofhowwecanexperiencethelocalcultures.Andfriendsaresurelygreatforthecompany,buttheycsokeepyourmindsettrappedinfamiliarterritorywhileabroad.無老師優(yōu)秀中文翻譯：不僅如此，雖然的是一個吃貨，但是我更看重這些地方的無老師平庸范例：And,Ireallylikefood,butIprefertheseplaces’historicalandartmeaning.LikeChineseeldersaying:walkingmillionandreadingbillionsvolumesisveryimportantforlife.Theseplacesarethelyingbooks,theywaitforreading.Theywillleadustoabigartclass,theynotonlyshowoffthebeautifullandscape,butalsoshowoffwillgoodartwork.Besides,thepurposeoftravellingiswideningourview.Deliciousfoodisapartofit,butitisonlyasmallpartofenjoyinglocalculture.Asacompany,friendsisgreat,buttheywillpushyoustayinafixedthinkingmodel,whenyouareintheothercountries.無老師精析：第一句，優(yōu)秀范例What’smore,eventhoughIamtrulyafoodlover,Ivaluemoreaboutthehistoricalandartmeaningofthesites.對比平庸And,Ireallylikefood,butIprefertheseplaces’historicalandartmeaninglikefood例很地道的用名詞性的foodlover來表示，就顯得很地道！然后再接下來優(yōu)秀范例的概念來表示喜愛，頗有鎮(zhèn)魂單詞題的感覺！而且在最后，優(yōu)秀范例還用了AofB表示“XXX的”也是很的感覺。AsaChineseoldsayinggoes,travelingtenthousandandreadingtenthousandbooksisthetopideaforpeople.和平庸范例LikeChineseeldersaying:walkingmillionandreadingbillionsvolumesisveryimportantforlifeAsaChineseoldsayinggoesisthetopideafor下面，優(yōu)秀范例：Thesitesarelikehugehistorybookslyingthere,waitingforustoreadTheseplacesarethelyingbooks,theywaitforarethelyingbookswaitingforusto第四句，優(yōu)秀范例Theyleadusintoagreatartclass,showinguseithernaturalsightsortheextremelyskillfulartificialities.對比平庸范例的Theywillleadustoabigartclass,theynotonlyshowoffthebeautifullandscape,butalsoshowoffwillgoodartwork.第一句差別不大，只是平庸范例的big略土，然后接下來優(yōu)秀范例再次祭出 ng這樣的結(jié)構(gòu)主句，而且還用了either…or…的結(jié)構(gòu)進(jìn)行連接，使得整句話形成一個整體，環(huán)環(huán)相扣。而且naturalsights和extremelyskillfulartificialities，想，我們平時有可能很少都見到這Besides,thepurposefortravelistoextendmyoutlooks.與Besides,thepurposeoftravellingiswideningourview.其實差別不大。第六句，來了！優(yōu)秀范例Foodiscertainlyonewaytodothat,butitonlyconstitutesasmallpartofhowwecanexperiencethelocalculturesDeliciousfoodisapartofit,butitisonlyasmallpartofenjoyingonewaytodothat然后優(yōu)秀范例用了constituteishowwecanexperiencethelocalculturesenjoyinglocalculture整篇文章的最后一句，則更顯地道！優(yōu)秀范例Andfriendsaresurelygreatforthecompany,buttheycsokeepyourmindsettrappedinfamiliarterritorywhileabroad.對比平庸范例Asacompany,friendsisgreat,buttheywillpushyoustayinafixedthinkingmodel,whenyouareintheothercountries.不知各as“作為”這層意思，這是兩種語言之間的邏輯而導(dǎo)致的表達(dá)方式不同。所以說優(yōu)秀范例很地道，然后優(yōu)秀范例的keepyourmindsettrappedin20136無老師優(yōu)秀范例:Aclearcareergoalisthecornerstoneofstudent’sfuturedevelopment.Providingaedcourseaboutcareerplanningcangiveorientationsofstudents’suitableoccupationdevelopment.Introductionsforproperfieldsmayinspirestudents’interestsonacquiringmorespecificknowledgebythemselves.Also,thisprocesswillhelpbuildabridgefromthetowerofivorytoarealsociety.Adequaypreparationsandpracticalskillswillbetaughtaboutdealingwithrelationshipswithinterviewersandworkmatesinthefuture.Thus,studentsbenefitalotforhavingdeepercomprehensionaboutcareerandtheirsuitablejobs.無老師平庸范例：Aclearjobplanisthefootstoneofthefuturedevelopment.Studyingaclassforcareerplanwillgivestudentsproperjobplan.Theintroductionoftheproperfieldwillencouragetheinterestofgettingmoreprofessionalknowledgebythemselves.Atthesametime,theprocesswillhelptobuildabridgewhichconnectthetowerofelephant’stuskandthesociety.Goodpreparationandusefulskillswillbetaught,itwillincludehowtosolvetherelationshipwiththeinterviewerandthecolleagues.Sostudentswillalotaboutthejobplanandtheproperjob.如果，所有的優(yōu)秀作文，進(jìn)行橫向比較的話，本篇作文一定不是在句式上取勝首先第一句，優(yōu)秀范例：Aclearcareergoalisthecornerstoneofstudents’futuredevelopment.對比平庸范例：Aclearjobplanisthefootstoneofthe個詞，也充分顯示出作者的詞匯量，平時我們還是用basic多一點。接下來，優(yōu)秀范例Providingaedcourseaboutcareerplanningcangiveorientationsofstudents’suitableoccupationdevelopment.對比平庸范例：Studyingaclassforcareerplanwillgivestudentsproperjobplan.優(yōu)秀范例的第一亮點就在于ed這個詞的使用，將這個平時最為常見于名詞詞性第三句，優(yōu)秀范例：Introductionsforproperfieldsmayinspirestudents’interestsonacquiringmorespecificknowledgebythemselves.Theintroductionoftheproperfieldwillencouragetheinterestofgettingmoreprofessionalknowledgebythemselves.這個第三句的優(yōu)秀范例實在是覺得在job、后，當(dāng)然是acquire和specific這兩個詞用的很好。第四句的優(yōu)點則在于作者閱讀量，或者作者的一點點文采！優(yōu)秀范例：Also,thisprocesswillhelpbuildabridgefromthetowerofivorytoarealsociety.對比平庸范例：Atthesametime,theprocesswillhelptobuildabridgewhichconnectthetowerofelephant’stuskandthesociety.“架起了兩者之間的橋梁towerofivory。再回頭看平庸范例的thetowerofelephant’stuskgoodgoodstudy,daydayup的?。〔蛔院谝幌?，難平??！其后，優(yōu)秀范例為Adequaypreparationsandpracticalskillswillbetaughtaboutdealingwithrelationshipswithinterviewersandworkmatesinthefuture.再來看平庸范例：Goodpreparationandusefulskillswillbetaught,itwillincludehowtosolvetherelationshipwiththeinterviewerandthecolleagues.Adequaypreparationsandpracticalskills。否則作者真的要抓狂了。至于后面的interviewers和workmates，應(yīng)該算是中等偏上的表達(dá)方法，算不得特別亮眼。最后一句，優(yōu)秀范例寫的是Thus,studentsbenefitalotforhavingdeepercomprehensionaboutcareerandtheirsuitablejobs.平庸范例則是潦草收場Sostudentswillalotaboutthejobplanandtheproperjobhaving真的菊緊，以后再用having的時候，能不能試一下去掉having，看看這句話是否通順！很多情況下，我們用的have用的是真沒必要！至于優(yōu)點，優(yōu)秀范例的benefitcomprehension20137無老師優(yōu)秀范例：Inthelecture,theprofessorcastsdoubtonthereadingpassagethatdeep-seaminingishopeful.Firstofall,accordingtothelecture,althoughtherearerichscarcelymetalsnearvolcanicventofseabed,immediatetechnologyfordeep-seaminingisundevelopedandthemetalsfromtheminingarenotalwaysavailable.Forexample,itishardtoseparatemetalsfromthesedimentintermsofcollectingtechnology.Moreover,transferringthemetalsoutoftheseaisnoteasywithrespecttotransportation.無老師平庸范例：Inthelecture,theprofessorstandsontheothersideofthereadingthatdiggingthemineinthedeepseaishopeful.Firstofall,accordingtothelecture,althoughtherearemanyraremetalsnearthevolcanicventofseafloor,thetechnologyofthedeepseaminingisnotgoodenoughfordigthesemetal.Forexample,itishardforustoseparatetheseraremetalsfromthesedimentsthatweexcavateinthedeepsea.What’smore,consideringthetroubleinthetransportation,itisnoteasyforustotransfertheseraremetals.3要寫多少 Inthelecture,theprofessorcastsdoubtonthereadingpassagethatdeep-seaminingishopeful.對比平庸范例：Inthelecture,theprofessorstandsontheothersideofthereadingthatdiggingthemineinthedeepseaishopeful.好吧，無老師錯了，平庸范例寫的稍微比優(yōu)秀范例好了一點點，主standsontheothersideofthereading寫的惟妙惟肖。Firstofall,accordingtothelecture,althoughtherearerichscarcelymetalsnearvolcanicventofseabed,immediatetechnologyfordeep-seaminingisundevelopedandthemetalsfromtheminingarenotalwaysavailable.對比平庸范例Firstofall,accordingtothelecture,althoughtherearemanyraremetalsnearthevolcanicventofseafloor,thetechnologyofthedeepseaminingisnotgoodenoughfordigthesemetalrichseafloorimmediatetechnology和undeveloped來分別表示的技術(shù)和不夠發(fā)達(dá)，這比起平庸范例單純用了technologyisnotgoodenoughareForexample,itishardtoseparatemetalsfromthesedimentintermsofcollectingtechnologyForexample,itishardforustoseparatetheseraremetalsfromthesedimentsthatweexcavateinthedeepsea.這里優(yōu)秀范例的亮點就是在于，平庸范例很麻煩的用了一個從句才寫清楚的thatweexcavateinthedeepsea，優(yōu)秀范例用了一個輕巧的固定搭配intermsofcollectingtechnologycollectingtechnology很多次的mine這層意思，顯得詞匯量很棒！Moreover,transferringthemetalsoutoftheseaisnoteasywithrespecttotransportationWhat’smore,consideringthetroubleinthetransportation,itisnoteasyforustotransfertheserare20138無老師優(yōu)秀范例：Secondly,theprofessorarguesthatharmfulmineralsandchemicalswillspreadoutthroughwatereveniftheminingspotiswithintwothousandkilometersfromthevolcanicvent.Andthesemineralsandchemicalswoulddriftbacktowardsthevent,whieansthattheecosystemsneartheventwouldbedisturbedandtheconsequencesarelong-term.Thereadingpassage,bycomparison,suggeststhatecosystemsnearbywouldnotbeaffected.2000無老師平庸范例：Secondly，theprofessorthinksbadmineralsandchemicalswillgoawaythroughwater,nomattertheminingpointislessthan2000metersfromthevolcanicvent.Themineralsandchemicalswouldflybacktothevolcanicvent,andthisimpliesthattheanimalsandplantswillbedestroyedbythemineralsandchemicals,andthiswillbealongtime.Thereadingpassage,incomparisonpointsthatthenearmineralsandchemicalswillnotbe綜合作文第一句Secondly,theprofessorarguesthatharmfulmineralsandchemicalswillspreadoutthroughwatereveniftheminingspotiswithintwothousandkilometersfromthevolcanicventSecondly，theprofessorthinksbadmineralsandchemicalswillgoawaythroughwater,nomattertheminingpointislessthan2000metersfromthevolcanicvent.顯然平庸范例的考友一定要注意！首先在優(yōu)秀范例之中，首先要特別注意的是作者寫的是theprofessor其后，優(yōu)秀范例也沒有像平庸范例那樣很土的用了bad，這個詞，而是羞答答的用了harmful，恩，，而且準(zhǔn)確多了！然后接下來優(yōu)秀范例用了spreadout這個表達(dá)方式，Andthesemineralsandchemicalswoulddriftbacktowardsthevent,whieansthattheecosystemsneartheventwouldbedisturbedandtheconsequencesarelong-termThemineralsandchemicalswouldflybacktothevolcanicvent,andthisimpliesthattheanimalsandplantswillbedestroyedbythemineralsandchemicals,andthiswillbealongtime.在這句的thiswillbealongtimethislongtimelong-term秀范例的優(yōu)點，首先在于drift特指的是飄動~~~~~，這跟fly相比，顯然意思表達(dá)的更準(zhǔn)至于優(yōu)秀范例的最后一句Thereadingpassage,bycomparison,suggeststhatecosystemsnearbywouldnotbeaffectedbycomparison20139無老師優(yōu)秀范例：Lastly,theprofessorpointsoutthatinternationalagenciesandlawsareonlyvalidforopensea.Butminingcompanieschoosecoastalareasofaparticularcountryasmininglocationswhicharemanagedby ernmentofthiscountryratherthanbythelaws.Thereforethelawsarenothelpfultoconfinetheminingcompanies.Thereadingpassage,incontrast,indicatestheinternationalagenciesandlawscouldregulateminingfirmsincaseofpollutingtheenvironment.無老師優(yōu)秀中文翻譯：最后，教授國際組織和國際法只對于公海有效。但是礦產(chǎn)公司選擇某一國家的沿海地區(qū)作為礦山，這些礦山可以由管理，而不是法律。因此，法律對于限制礦產(chǎn)公司沒有任何作用。閱讀材料相反，國際組織和國際法應(yīng)該限制礦無老師平庸范例：Thirdly,lecturesaidthatinternationalorganizationandlawsareusedintheopensea.Butminingcompanieswouldchooseacountry’sshoreasthemining,thisminingwouldbecontrolledbythe ernment,butnotthelaws.So,thelawswouldnotcontroltheminingcompany.Butthereadingsaidthatinternationalorganizationandlawsshouldrestricttheseminingcompanies,andshouldnotletthempolluteenvironment.第一句，優(yōu)秀范例：Lastly,theprofessorpointsoutthatinternationalagenciesandlawsareonlyvalidforopensea.對比平庸范例：Thirdly,lecturesaidthatinternationalorganizationandlawsareusedintheopensea.顯然，平saidpointsout詞，用validuseful互換，顯然可以增加詞匯的多樣性。其后，優(yōu)秀范例Butminingcompanieschoosecoastalareasofaparticularcountryasmininglocationswhicharemanagedbytheernmentofthiscountryratherthanbythelaws.顯然比平庸范例的用詞要準(zhǔn)確得多Butminingcompanieswouldchooseacountry’sshoreasthemining,thisminingwouldbecontrolledbythe ernment,butnotthelaws.在這里，優(yōu)秀范例的coastalareas、aparticularcountry、mininglocations、ratherthan顯然，我們都能讀懂，但是很有式的貧乏。相比起來平庸范例的shore就顯得不夠準(zhǔn)確，因為特指海邊，但是礦山又不可接下來，優(yōu)秀范例的aparticularcountry、mininglocations、ratherthan都使得原句的準(zhǔn)確性和連貫性想比平庸范例的acountry，theminingbutnot要好很多。Thereforethelawsarenothelpfultoconfinetheminingcompanies.So,thelawswouldnotcontroltheminingcompany.這里的平庸范例顯然是一個錯誤范例，請注意confinecontrol這兩個詞在意思上的細(xì)微差最后一句，優(yōu)秀范例Thereadingpassage,incontrast,indicatestheinternationalagenciesandlawscouldregulateminingfirmsincaseofpollutingtheenvironmentButthereadingsaidthatinternationalorganizationandlawsshouldrestricttheseminingcompanies,andshouldnotregulate和firm來替換confine和company，十分！然后最后又用了一個大招incaseofshouldnotlet，哪怕是比起更準(zhǔn)確的很多的！一個incaseof，留者身后無盡功與名！201310無老師優(yōu)秀范例：Thecoursesaremutualbeneficialfornotonlythestudentsbutalsotheuniversity.Increasingemploymentratesofgraduateslargelyboosttheschool’sreputationamongitspotentialapplication,thereby;theschoolwillattractbetterstudentsWhat’smore,thesuccessfulgraduatesarelikelytodonatemoremoneyforthebetterfutureoftheirmotherschool,justthinkingabouttheIvyLeague’sfundsandtheirgreatreputationsinthewholeworld.So,thereisnoexcuseforschoolnottotakeadvantagesoftheresourcestohelpstudentsabetterdevelopmentincareer.無老師平庸范例：TheseclassesareusefulforthestudentandtheTheincreasingofthegraduates’employmentratewillincreasetheschool’snameinthestudentswhoaregoingtoapply,andtheuniversitywillattractmoregoodstudents.Besides,thosesuccessfulstudentsmaygivemoremoneytothemotherschooltohelptheuniversity’sdevelopment,andwecanunderstandthatbytheexampleoftheIvyLeague’smoneyandtheirgoodnameintheworld.Sothereisnoexcusefortheuniversitiestodonotusetheirresourcetohelpthestudentstohaveagooddevelopmentintheirjob.第一句，亮劍！優(yōu)秀范例：Thecoursesaremutualbeneficialfornotonlythestudentsbutalsotheuniversity.對比平庸范例：Theseclassesareusefulforthestudentandtheuniversitybeneficial雖然我們都能想到用notonly…butalso…這樣的固定搭配來連接“不僅，而且”但是能第二句，上刺刀！優(yōu)秀范例：Increasingemploymentratesofgraduateslargelyboosttheschool’sreputationamongitspotentialapplication,thereby;theschoolwillattractbetterstudents.對比平庸范例Theincreasingofthegraduates’employmentratewillincreasetheschool’snameinthestudentswhoaregoingtoapply,andtheuniversitywillattractmoregoodstudents.很顯然，在這里雖然?雖然在句子的開始，優(yōu)秀范例和平庸范例都用了Increasing硬的中文對英文的直接的翻譯，但是在優(yōu)秀范例之中，Increasing來使用，但是仍然十分準(zhǔn)確的表達(dá)出了“增加”的這層含義，而且沒有絲毫的喧賓奪主，可以說是分成功。接下來，優(yōu)秀范例又嬌了一下自己的單詞量，用boost這個詞，第三句，殺！優(yōu)秀范例：What’